Israelis Hope To Avoid Choice Between Lousy Gov’t And New Elections By Dying Of COVID

Choosing a “third way” to escape the purgatory of political futility.

Jerusalem, August 5 – Ongoing tensions, ineffectiveness, and instability of Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu’s ruling coalition have made many citizens aware that they may soon face the fourth parliamentary contest in less than a year and a half, even as they note the government’s lousy performance in nearly all areas, with the only palatable option remaining an agonizing, fatal bout of coronavirus.

Recent polls indicate broad dissatisfaction with Netanyahu’s government and with the actions of his coalition partners, in addition to their disapproval of the political opposition’s underwhelming performance since this past March and lack of confidence that any capable opposition figures can succeed where Netanyahu has failed. Ideological, personal, and policy-related differences threaten to bring down the government and force yet another round of elections that no serious analyst believes would result in anything but the same stalemate that has characterized Israeli politics since April 2019, the first in the current series of elections. The prospect of another such fruitless contest, with the hassle and expense it entails, only to have it lead to yet another one when no lasting coalition forms, has citizens exploring non-political avenues to escape the quagmire such as contracting SARS-CoV-2 and waiting for it to kill them.

Commentators and political leaders have struggled to articulate a case compelling enough for Israelis to continue adhering to the distancing, masking, and isolation guidelines first announced in March; a flattened curve of infections, hospitalizations, and deaths after the initial outbreak led to what many observers characterize as a combination of complacency and fatigue, compounded by factors such as economic insecurity, the need to socialize, and arbitrary or discriminatory enforcement of mask provisions. However, the hopeless political situation, in which no one likes Netanyahu, but nor can they put forth a credible alternative, has led some commentators to find a different explanation for the second wave of COVID ravaging the country: people choosing a “third way” to escape the purgatory of political futility.

“On balance, I’d rather die a horrible death as I struggle to breathe and can’t even receive comfort from, or say goodbye to, my loved ones,” confirmed retired lawyer Shimon Zechariah, 74. “If that’s the only way to avoid going through another pointless election, so be it.”

“I get it, even though I’m disappointed,” admitted Palestinian official Saeb Erekat. “It’s not supposed to be disease that wipes out the Jews, but virtuous Arab violence. We’ll just have to settle for watching happily from the sidelines and then massacring whoever’s left.”

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