‘Fatties For Palestine’ Get Stuck In Border Crossing, Blocking Aid To Gaza

The group has depleted two eighteen-wheelers carrying food for hungry Gazans.

Kerem Shalom, May 23 – A group of activists among the People of Size community attempted today to show their support for the beleaguered people of the Gaza Strip, but their girth ended up preventing both their own passage into the territory and the passage of two hundred trucks waiting behind them to deliver food, medicine, and other humanitarian supplies.

Six members of Fatties for Palestine arrived in Israel yesterday and traveled to this crossing point into the Gaza Strip, eyewitnesses say, only to get stuck in the open gateway when the ground gave way underneath them and they could not extract themselves from the depression their weight created. An IDF spokesman disclosed that the military was working to get a big enough crane to the site to lift the activists out, but that the backup of semitrailers along the highways leading to Kerem Shalom made the operation difficult.

“We’re doing what we can,” assured Colonel Adi Pose, a unit spokesman. “Keeping Gaza’s civilians fed is part of our mission. It’s hard to do that with the crossing blocked. We are working on a solution.”

Initial attempts to pull the Fatties out using winches, pickup trucks, even a tank, failed. “It’s not like pulling a vehicle,” explained Pose. “These are people, and we haven’t been able to get the straps in the right places to safely lift them out. We have some pneumatic drills and excavators working on a solution, as well, but that’s a slow process. We can’t risk injury to the… visitors. It certainly would not look wonderful, politically. Digging up the pavement also means we have to fix it afterwards, which will further delay the entry of all those trucks into Gaza.”

Observers reported that the digging equipment can only operate for cumulative forty-five minutes per day; the rest of the time, the space where they must dig is occupied by smaller vehicles delivering the substantial quantities of food and drink needed to sustain the group of activists. Already, two eighteen-wheelers carrying food for hungry Gazans have been depleted. Humanitarian groups warned that the entire supply column stands in jeopardy if the activists cannot be freed within a few days.

For the same reason, journalists have been unable to approach the six activists to interview them properly. Shouted questions elicit incoherent answers; the only identifiable statements from the group has involved familiar slogans in support of Palestinian “resistance” and calls for liberation from “settler-colonialist fatphobia.”

Sources within the Gaza Strip indicated that Hamas might have a use for the activists as human shields that can protect up to thirty fighters each.

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