Spelling-Challenged Anti-Islam Activists Protest Vail (Colorado)

The name “Vail” gives undeserved tribute to a culture that subjugates women, promotes terrorism, and suppresses dissent.

Vail, CO, June 17 – A group of semiliterate activists opposed to Islamic practices demonstrated in this Rocky Mountain resort town Wednesday, demanding that the village and its economic anchor, the ski resort, select a name that does not refer to the women’s face covering common in Islamic cultures.

About two dozen protesters from American Freedumb and Defense congregated on Gore Creek Drive, holding placards and chanting slogans. A series of speakers alternately led “Rail Against The Vail” chants and addressed the attendees through a megaphone, repeating their admonition to the village’s residents and political leadership that the name “Vail” gives undeserved tribute to a culture that subjugates women, promotes terrorism, and suppresses dissent.

“We’ve come here, to what is otherwise a beautiful, picturesque place, to stand up to the creeping Islamization of America,” said protest organizer Shari Alaw. “Vail, Vail change your name, or ‘Merica won’t be the same!”

Residents regarded the protesters as something of a curiosity, an mostly kept their distance. The few interactions that did occur appeared to take place only between journalists and either participants or onlookers, but not both. One resident said some of the protesters had asked her for directions.

“A car with a bunch of these people – I see at least two of them in the crowd right now – stopped next to me this morning and asked how to get to Gore Creek Drive,” said Pam Gellert, who has lived here almost since the village was built in the 1960’s. “They also asked where the mosque was, and I had to ask them to repeat that, because we don’t have one here. There’s a Reform synagogue, I think, but they weren’t interested in that.”

“Change your name, don’t call it Vail – Sharia is gonna fail!” shouted the protesters, expressing concern that the town’s name reflects the pernicious and increasing influence of Islamic practice on American life. A demonstrator who gave his name as “Kahn-Spira, C.” told reporters that Jihadis were cheering that one of the nation’s most famous ski resorts was not immune from their onslaught. “9/11 was just the beginning,” he warned. “They’re going to take over every town in America unless we stand up to them. Off with the vail!”

“What’s next – Burkha, Ohio? Hijab, North Dakota?” challenged Anita Schooling. “They’re already calling this town a tourist Mecca. Next thing you know we’ll have Female Genital Mutilation, Georgia!” The protesters erupted in jeers.

By midday the demonstrators had packed up and left, leaving Mayor Andy Daly and his staff puzzled. “The place is named for the highway engineer who first brought a main road to this part of the state in 1940,” he said. “We haven’t had a political protest here in living memory. I wish I understood what’s going on here. Am I supposed to be for? Against?”

“Well, that’s done, in any case,” he added. “And now it’s time for noontime prayers.”