Separate Parents’, Kids’ Bathrooms Prompt ‘Apartheid’ Charge

By contrast, no media organizations have ever reported seeing such an intolerable phenomenon in Gaza.

Ramat Gan, March 14 – Local parents Yariv and Dafna Omer faced accusations of Apartheid in his household today after human rights groups discovered they mandate separate toilet and bathing facilities for the parents and children in the household, respectively, and that the children and neighbors are excluded from most decision-making processes in the family.

Human Rights Watch activist Jessica Montell and Amnesty International official Jacob Burns denounced the Omer parents for the blatant practice of Apartheid, saying the practice calls to mind the darkest days of the Botha regime in South Africa.

“We were appalled to discover that non-members of the household are regularly barred from participating in the processes that govern the Omer family,” said Montell in a statement on behalf of Human Rights Watch. “Such flagrant disregard for the status of people who by genetic accident are not members of the ‘tribe’ constitutes some of the worst discrimination that I have seen.” She demanded that the parents immediately allow their children to use whichever bathrooms they please, and permit any and all neighbors be allowed to exercise a vote in the everyday decisions that govern the Omer household.

Burns issued similar condemnation. “The arbitrary exclusion of non-Omer people from the governance of the Omer family is nothing less than Apartheid rearing its ugly head, and I must say I am not surprised to see it in Israel,” said Burns. “I call on the international community to swiftly and unreservedly distance itself from this odious practice and sanction Israel for endorsing its occurrence.” He added that no media organizations have ever seen fit to report on such an intolerable phenomenon in Gaza.

The separate bathrooms, especially, sparked the ire of the organizations. “One cannot help but associate the segregated facilities with the pre-civil-rights era in the American South,” remarked Montell. “All that’s missing in the Omer household is a sign on the restroom door reading, ‘ No one under 18 permitted beyond this point.’ It’s sickening.”

Local activists promised quick action. “We are organizing a march down Tz’elim Street tomorrow afternoon,” where the Omers live, announced prominent human rights campaigner Ezra Nawi. “I’m especially concerned for the children – the young, impressionable, vulnerable, beautiful children. I can’t stop thinking about them,” he added, sweating slightly and licking his lips.

The Omers denied any wrongdoing. “Why should we let some outsider have a say in the internal affairs of this household?” protested Dafna.

“That’s exactly the Dark-Ages attitude we’re here to combat!” yelled Nawi, not taking his eyes off fourteen-year-old Yaniv.