Palestinians Cite ‘I Called It First’ Rule To Establish Title To Land

Prominent personalities already noted that calling “Shotgun!” is an accepted method for establishing the right to sit in the front passenger seat of a motor vehicle.

Ramallah, May 2 – Referring to a principle commonly invoked in settling certain types of disputes, Palestinian officials repeated their claim that all of historic Palestine is theirs based on the fact that they called it first.

Senior Fatah officials told a delegation of visitors from Europe and the Far East today that based on their yelling “First come!” or “Dibs!” in reference to the land, the Palestinian national claim to the place must take precedence over any other considerations, especially that of the Jews.

Speaking to a group of business and low-level political leaders exploring an expansion of commercial ties to Palestinian agriculture and an emerging corporate sector, Saeb Erekat took the opportunity to list the ways in which Palestinian attachment to the land and Palestinian national aspirations trump Israel’s sovereignty and territorial claims. “It has long been established that when professionals compete for possession of, for example, a ball, calling heads or tails serves to create an irreversible claim on that side of the coin,” he argued. “Thus, given our ancient pedigree and the fact that we are descended from whichever pre-Israelite civilization will convince the most people of our indigenous status, it should be indisputable that we called it first, and Israel must leave. We called it, and that’s that.”

Legal experts note that Erekat’s citation of the rule applies in myriad situations, notably when two children are chasing after an errant ball or frisbee, in circumstances under which immediate possession of that object confers the privilege of being the next to use it. “I remember when we were playing catch with my dad at a park one day, and the frisbee got away from us, and my older brother and I were both chasing it, and he yelled, ‘First come!’ I was forced to give up the chase right there, because he called it,” explained legal scholar Johnny Kumlaitly.

Precedent also exists for the legitimacy of calling it as a legitimate method of establishing title. A search of case histories found that in the 1990’s, prominent personalities had already noted that calling “Shotgun!” was an accepted method for establishing the right to sit in the front passenger seat of a motor vehicle. Similarly, yelling, “Not It!” at the outset of a game of tag determined that, as long as the yeller was not the last person to yell the phrase, he or she is not, in fact, It.