Israel To Have Russia Bomb Gaza So World Stays Silent

A Russian bombing campaign in the Gaza Strip would enable the use of far more brutal and destructive – and therefore effective – methods than the IDF allows itself to employ.

Tel Aviv, October 19 – The relative equanimity with which the international community has greeted Russia’s role in flattening Aleppo from the air has led Israeli leaders to consider subcontracting its next offensive in the Gaza Strip to Putin’s forces in order to avoid the inevitable global opprobrium that accompanies each Israeli attempt to defend itself from Hamas.

Defense Ministry and Israel Defense Force officials issued recommendations to the Prime Minister and the Foreign Affairs and Defense Committee to use improved ties with Russia to military and political advantage, specifically regarding the ongoing threat of Hamas rockets and invasion tunnels. A five-month strategic assessment will present its conclusions Wednesday to the committee, and it released a preliminary summary in advance of that meeting, to the effect that a Russian bombing campaign in the Gaza Strip would enable the use of far more brutal and destructive – and therefore effective – methods than the IDF allows itself to employ.

IDF Chief of Staff Lt. General Gadi Eizenkot told reporters that the possible new tack would carry immense advantages for Israel. “Russia faces none of the diplomatic and political obstacles that we do in terms of allegations of human rights violations and civilian casualties,” he explained. “They have never needed to constrain themselves and to consult with law experts in advance of every operation to ensure compliance with the Laws of Armed Combat, the way the IDF does. The various international bodies that erupt in cries of ‘War crimes!’ at every act of Israeli self-defense are unlikely to care what Russia does, given the precedent of Aleppo. And Abkhazia. And Chechnya. And Ukraine. I’m sure there are others.”

Some political leaders nevertheless urged caution. “It would be unwise to relinquish full control of our self-defense to an outside entity, no matter how advantageous the planned military operations in question might be,” warned Minister of Energy Yuval Steinitz. “If we do go in this direction, it has to be handled delicately. I’m sure Putin would not hesitate to expand the Russian sphere of influence southward from Syria. We would have to find a way to make unrestrained Russian action in Gaza worthwhile for Putin in terms that do not involve a fundamental alteration of the regional order and our freedom of action. Of course the trade-off might be worth it, if it means destroying Hamas once and for all, and not facing a firestorm of international criticism for it.”

Skeptics of the move lamented the lack of good alternatives. “It would be an unprecedented and short-sighted measure,” asserted former Labor Party leader Ehud Barak. “We can’t surrender our sovereignty like that. It has to be done properly, by a Labor-led government.”