We Prepare Our People For Peace By Teaching Them Never To Compromise

By Saeb Erekat

It is time to put to rest the notion that we Palestinians are not preparing our people for peace with Israel. As our president said to Mr. Trump in Washington two weeks ago, ours is a culture of peace. We have made numerous moves to inculcate peace into our polity, and because the distorted rhetoric of our enemies has made it necessary, I shall now delineate the myriad ways in which we teach our people peace.

1. We instruct our children in school, and our population on social media, that everything the enemy has is inherently ours, and never for a moment forget that each tiny clod of earth in Palestine was usurped by the Zionist rapist warmonger who must be defeated and expelled at all costs. Only then might we have peace.
2. We thwart attacks on Israelis by paying handsome lifetime pensions to the families of martyrs killed while trying to slaughter Jews. If our heroes are imprisoned, we pay them even more generous monthly stipends. This promotes peaceful contemplation of new ways to kill and main Jews.
3. We name streets, public squares, community facilities, children’s programs, and myriad institutions after those who showed us the only legitimate method of resistance: killing as many Jews as possible, in the most brutal ways imaginable. This demonstrates beyond a doubt how we feel about peace.
4. Our textbooks and maps show only the Palestine whose borders were established by Western powers after the First World War, and treats those borders as the eternally sacred lines where no Jew may ever exercise sovereignty, because our ancestors conquered it before theirs did. Wait, I mean our ancestors conquered it after theirs did, and undid their claim. But that doesn’t mean their subsequent conquest erased our claim – it doesn’t work that way, or we’ll hijack your planes. Got it? Peace.
5. Those textbooks and maps never show Israel as Israel, and refers even to cities and towns under Israeli control before 1967 as “Palestine.” This prepares the current and future generation never to recognize the legitimacy of any other entity on this soil, and promotes peaceful violent resistance.
6. Our media depict Israelis as monstrous, inhuman criminals with no redeeming qualities, let alone anything that might want us to live in peace with them. This promotes a peaceful culture by making Palestinians want to live somewhere else, but we don’t let them, because that would undermine the legitimacy of the Palestinian leadership, which would rather see Palestinian refugees succumb to starvation and violence in Syrian camps than to relinquish the dream of flooding Israel with millions of descendants of people who fled Palestine in 1948 to make killing the Jews there easier for our Jordanian, Egyptian, Syrian, and Iraqi warrior brethren, then got stuck there when the Jews had the gall to defeat them.

That should suffice. Did I tell you Israel harvested all my organs?

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