I’d Love To Attend Your Protest, But I’m Attending A Protest

By Yisraela M’khoar

It’s very sweet of you to invite me to come to your demonstration this is week. I really want to come, but I’m sorry, I’m already holding a different rally, so I can’t come that night. Maybe some other time?

I hope you convey my protest to the target of your demonstration, and my regrets that I will be unable to attend. It’s just that my other protest was scheduled already, and I can’t reschedule. I really do want to attend yours – I wish there were a way to attend both, but they’e in different cities at the same time.

Please understand I mean no slight to your cause, whether it’s the plight of the disabled and their demands for higher social security pensions; the chaos with African migrants in South Tel Aviv; the apparent refusal of the Attorney General to investigate or prosecute the prime minister the way you want; a Palestinian state; no Palestinian state; whoever’s turn it is in the public sector to strike this week; or one of the other six or seven protests called for more or less the same time. Which one was yours again?

I can’t remember the last time we managed to spend time at the same protest. Was it last year? I’m not even sure that one counts – we kind of caught sight of each other a couple of times, but didn’t really get to exchange any real conversation, let alone stand together holding a sign and chant or boo. I can’t even recall what that demonstration was for or against, can you?  Was it road safety infrastructure after some fatal accident? Was it a demand for better enforcement of building codes? Which side of the Hebron shooter fiasco were we even on?

You know, it might have been that victory parade when the Beersheva football team finally won a championship, and not a protest at all. That was a stirring experience. Tens of thousands of people – hundreds of thousands, if you believe the hype – all coming together to salute the overpaid stuntmen hired to represent a desert town, by blocking traffic, trashing the neighborhood, and wasting tons of municipal resources just to secure the event. Funny how there was no counter-protest against that waste of city resources. Good times.

One of these days we, as a society, might figure out a way to spend our time that doesn’t involve disrupting the lives of area residents, but in the meantime, I look forward to eventually attending the same protest as you.

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