Trump Excited To Read Salacious Parts Of Stormy Daniels Tell-All Book

“It’s going to be the best memoir, because it’s about m- it’s about the president,” claimed a senior administration official.

Washington, March 14 – White House insiders disclosed today that despite maintaining a public façade of indifference, the president cannot wait to get his hands on a forthcoming book by a porn star with whom he had an affair, in particular the parts that go into lurid detail about their encounters.

Aides to Donald Trump confirmed this morning that while the official White House and Republican view of the episode deems the allegations non-credible and sees them as a smear attempt, in private Mr. Trump has voiced eagerness to find the raunchy bits of the Stormy Daniels memoir and review them.

“I’m not sure he’s really interested in any other parts of the book, should there be any,” remarked an aide, speaking on condition of anonymity. “It wouldn’t be like him – you know about him and having to read too much. It’s like that in the daily intelligence briefings, so we know what to expect. My guess is if Ms. Daniels wants the president to read her book, she’ll make it only about the dirty parts.”

“It’s going to be the best memoir, because it’s about m- it’s about the president,” claimed a senior administration official. “It’ll be terrific. Of course it’s fake news, it’s fake news, but I guarantee it’ll be the raciest thing you ever read. Crooked Hillary could only dream of being included in a book like this – it’ll be the biggest bestseller of all time, and I mean bigly. Just terrific.”

Interest in the prurient sections of the anticipated book comes from other political quarters as well. “There’s at least one former occupant of the White House who can’t wait to get his hands, so to speak, on those passages,” commented a former intern from the Clinton administration. “I mean, it may or may not be as hardcore as the Starr Report, and I’m sure plenty of folks will claim to speak of the book as a whole, or deny having looked at it altogether, but if you believe that, you’ll believe it makes sense to defend the truthfulness of testimony using an argument over what the meaning of ‘is’ is.”

One prominent Republican Senate staffer predicted her boss would do the equivalent of ‘liking’ the book’s dirty parts on Twitter, then blame it on an aide. An assistant to Vice President Mike Pence indicated the VP would only read the prurient portions of the work with his wife.

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