Clouds Left Behind In Iran By Mossad Deny They’re Bitter

News of Israel stealing Iran’s rain clouds broke earlier his week when an Iranian general made the accusation in an address.

Qom, July 5 – Masses of atmospheric water droplets and other particles forced to remain in the skies over the Islamic Republic of Iran insisted they harbor no resentment over not being selected for removal to Israel while other nearly identical specimens did qualify.

Iranian clouds told interviewers this week that despite having to stay in the repressive land of the ayatollahs and not providing rain or shade to a freer locale, they begrudge other clouds who did make the secret trip nothing.

“Listen, more power to them, I say,” declared Anan, a stratocumulus wisp floating over this holy city. “If a cloud attracts enough notice to be chosen for relocation to a better place, that’s awesome. There’s little point in nursing resentment over it. I’m going to disappear soon anyway, so it makes little difference.”

Other echoed her sentiments. “We’re lucky to be living at a time when it’s even possible for the the Mossad to steal us and take us to Israel,” observed a cirrus named Ed.  “You can’t waste your brief life in anger over others having what you don’t. Still, I can’t deny I’m not keeping a metaphorical eye out for Israeli agents or devices that might take me away from all this.”

News of Israel stealing Iran’s rain clouds broke earlier his week when an Iranian general made the accusation in an address. No official sources disclosed how long the cloud-napping has been occurring, but informal discussions in the Persian cloud community indicated at least five years of cloud theft.

“I couldn’t tell you, because most of it’s rumor and hearsay, but sometimes clouds just disappear,” explained Aabr, a cirrus. “I mean, they tend to disappear within a couple of hours of formation anyway, so the stories are hard to confirm. But there’s been talk of ‘migration’ to Israel at least since 2013. I think it’s been going on much longer, but that’s just the sense I have from the atmosphere around here. Nothing firm to back it up.”

Clouds over Iran take a circumspect view of possible local efforts to prevent further Mossad cloud-napping. “Not sure what Tehran thinks it can do,” muttered Av, a cumulonimbus just offshore over the Persian Gulf. “They have their hands full with people protesting economic deprivation and all sorts of resource problems, not to mention political dissatisfaction. Then you have the public image disasters of the Mossad operations – both us clouds and the nuclear program documents a couple of months ago – and I don’t see the leadership having the time or capacity to address this.”

“Still,” he continued. “I’m OK not raining over Iran even if I have to stay.”

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