Arabian Desert Countries Offer Water To Los Angeles To Fight Fires

Leaders in the Gaza Strip have offered to spare some of the copious humanitarian aid flowing into the territory.

Riyadh, January 14 – Middle East states with few or no rivers, and with only the capacity of desalination plants and overtaxed aquifers, have sent messages to Southern California counties struggling to contain massive blazes – messages with expressions solidarity, but also making available their vastly superior aquatic resources for those Californian locales to help extinguish the blazes.

Saudi Arabia, Qatar, the United Arab Emirates, Oman, Kuwait, And Bahrain, which feature almost entirely desert, have offered Los Angeles and its environs water to fight the fires that broke out there last week, and which local authorities have struggled to contain because of decades-long mismanagement of water and firefighting resources, personnel, and equipment.

“Those poor souls, with no water – I wouldn’t want to live like that,” stated Saudi Ambassador to the US Reema bint Bandar Al Saud. “That is why my government, and those of several neighboring countries with similar experience, will share our comparatively vast water resources with the water-deprived regions in and around Los Angeles.”

“Our consortium will also provide water conservation and management consultations,” added United Arab Emirates envoy Yosef Al Otaiba. “Clearly, those backward people don’t have their act together and need the help of those with more experience in the arena. I hope they get enough to drink, as well. We should send pallets of potable water, maybe a few tankers of it, as well. Someone needs to teach those Californians about proper hydration.”

Others in the region have realized that water is not the only need in the Greater Los Angeles area during and after the fires. Prominent leaders in the Gaza Strip have offered to spare some of the copious humanitarian aid flowing into the territory, to help those displaced from destroyed neighborhoods southern California. UNRWA, the United Nations’ chief institution for assisting Palestinian “refugees,” acknowledged today that some of the hundreds of trucks sitting idle for weeks after Israel allowed them into the Gaza Strip might offer some succor to the suffering Angelenos.

“It’s not characteristic of our organization or those it serves to admit anyone needs anything more than Palestinians do,” noted Philippe Lazzarini, UNRWA Director. “But the footage, sounds, and imagery coming from Los Angeles are apocalyptic. The filmmakers in Gaza could never hope to compete with the production values in play in Hollywood’s own backyard; we could never produce propaganda videos of that quality or magnitude. And our acting is terrible. Don’t even get me started on the editing foul-ups. Pallywood has a long way to go.”

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