by Ismail Haniyeh, Hamas political chief Doha, March 31 – Forbes reported last week that our movement has surpassed Hezbollah as the world’s best-funded terrorist organization, with more than a billion dollars moving through our coffers on a per annum ...
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“I don’t really know how to react,” admitted the rock, “but I’ll probably have plenty of time to ruminate on it.” Nebi Saleh, March 30 – A broken-off portion of dolomite outcropping that lay untouched for eons as species evolved ...
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“My first thought is I did something wrong in placing the charms, so that they are actually having no effect.” Jerusalem, March 25 – A customer at a cut-price chain retailer voiced her consternation today upon discovering not only that ...
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Some respite from the grueling work of doing diddly-squat. Jerusalem, March 25 – Israeli legislators began to breathe easy today with the approach of the springtime Pesach festival, knowing that the time off before, during, and after the holiday allows ...
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“Crap. I just remembered Eddie Van Halen is dead.” Jerusalem, March 24 – Middle-aged residents of this city and others in the Western world who grew up referring to songs popular when their own mothers and fathers were growing up as ...
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A good number are the same useful idiots who have always proved so easy to manipulate through Soviet and soviet-style propaganda. Sanaa, Yemen, March 23 – A group of Iran-backed rebels in this impoverished country at the southern end of ...
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“The multiple rapes I’ve suffered on my way here with traffickers are probably nothing compared to the rape of Palestine.” San Antonio, March 22 – Minors detained in over-capacity holding facilities after crossing into the country from Mexico voiced the ...
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by Lieutenant Zorb-8, Watch Commander, Galaga-X Scout Vessel 22R, Squadron Blue, Intergalactic Fleet Task Force M Intergalactic Standard Date 14.5.99.008, in orbit around Earth – Captain, our surface team has returned from the planet with several specimens upon which to conduct ...
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One juicy line of gossip insists the lover is a man, not a woman. Rafah, March 18 – Scandal erupted today in this city on the Palestinian side of the Egyptian border when a wife unearthed her husband’s activities down ...
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“We can’t just use the blood of goyim indiscriminately as we used to, not in the current epidemiological environment.” Jerusalem, March 17 – Consumers beginning their acquisitions for the upcoming Passover festival have noticed an uptick in expenses stemming from ...
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