“Whereas previous assessments almost all relied on, or gave significant weight to, adherence to some sort of explicit ancient tradition, our model has determined those those factors are a mere distraction.” London, November 27 – Groundbreaking new research into the ...
Read More »Author Archives: Swidler
Feed SubscriptionIran Says Unarmed Protesters Just Human Shields For Other Unarmed Protesters
“100% of the protesters and bystanders injured, arrested, or killed in these incidents had it coming, just as 100% of our population is heterosexual.” Shiraz, November 26 – Authorities in the Islamic Republic explained the large number of protester shooting ...
Read More »Bibi Agrees To Resign If Gantz, Lapid, Yaalon, Ashkenazi, Liberman Do Too
If calls for his resignation stem from genuine concern for the integrity of Israeli democracy and rule of law, and not just an opportunity to get rid of the person who stands in the way of their own designs. Jerusalem, ...
Read More »Environmentalist Joins Hobo’s ‘The End Is Nigh’ Procession
Sitting, marching, holding signs, and chanting at others about society’s imminent collapse. Tel Aviv, November 21 – An activist worried that human-driven climate change will doom civilization and disrupt the planet’s fragile ecosystems within twelve years has found a kindred ...
Read More »Missiles Hit Damascus; Syrians Agree Gender Reveals Getting Out Of Hand
“The narcissism of the era has really warped people’s common sense.” Damascus, November 21 – Israeli airstrikes hit weapons storage facilities and equipment in and around the Syrian capital two nights ago, with at least one attempted interception of an ...
Read More »‘Vote Corbyn – Vote Palestine!’ Cry Britons Accusing Jews Of Dual Loyalties
The phenomenon of combating the dual loyalty of Jews to Israel with the dual loyalty of others to Palestine has migrated far beyond Britain’s borders, and in fact originated in the Muslim world. Islington, November 20 – Britain’s Opposition Leader in Parliament ...
Read More »You Have To Let Me Into Your House And May Not Kick Me Out When I Spout Offensive Lies About You
by Omar Shakir, Human Rights Watch New York, November 19 – Hello, thank you, how do you do? Yes, I do, thank you very much. My, what a lovely home. Well, except for all the bad decorating, maintenance, management, parenting, ...
Read More »Obama-Era Officials Figure Iran’s No-Nukes Fatwa Stored Together With No-Shooting-Protesters Fatwa
Ben Rhodes added that Americans can make the same confident assumption about China’s Muslim Uighur minority. Washington, November 18 – Former cabinet members and other people within the administration of the previous US president again assured Americans they need not ...
Read More »Iran Reaffirms Resolve To Fight Israel Down To Last Palestinian
“We will supply you with whatever you need until there are no more left of you to supply.” Tehran, November 14 – Leaders of the Islamic Republic asserted again their commitment to combating the existence of the Jewish State until ...
Read More »Israelis Admit Tenser About More Elections Than About More Rockets
Accepting pointless elections every few months as an inescapable fact of life, to be managed rather than overcome, that’s something else entirely. Kibbutz Zikim, November 14 – The most recent barrages of missiles from Islamist groups in the neighboring Gaza ...
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