He proceeded to call his children to inform them of the milestone, and to bask in the anticipated admiration they would no doubt display. Maale Adummim, September 5 – A resident of this town in the Judean Desert east of Jerusalem ...
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Feed SubscriptionChina Cancels Adoption Of Judaism, Fearing Muslim Nations Will No Longer Endorse Its Repression Of Muslims
“The precedent of the Jewish state of Israel, which engages in all the same activities as any other state but somehow attracts inexplicable venom from the Muslim world, indicates what awaits China should it embark on this Judaism policy.” Beijing, ...
Read More »Out-Of-Shape IDF Recruits Now Eligible To Serve As Mannequins At Lebanese Border
The army will thus expand eligibility for “combat” status, which commands greater prestige and higher pay. Shlomi, September 4 – A new Israeli military tactic in the long-running conflict with the Shiite militia Hezbollah has created combat opportunities for soldiers ...
Read More »It’s Racist Of Israel Not To Let Us Ban Jews From The Other 3% Of Hebron
by Subhi Sh’hada Hebron, September 3 – I need not inform the reader that my hometown bears the distinction of one of the most radicalized locations in the region, if not the world. A hardcore group of several hundred Jews, ...
Read More »Scalpers Driving Up High Holiday Seat Prices
Rabbi Phil T. Luker has spoken out against the phenomenon. New York, September 2 – Would-be synagogue attendees find themselves unable to afford tickets to New Year and Day of Atonement services at metro area Jewish houses of worship, observers report, ...
Read More »Lebanese Baffled Why Israel So Bad At Apartheid Vs Palestinians When Lebanon Right There Showing Them How
“Officially, as you know, this is for their own sake, which is why we also build high walls around their camps, we love them so much.” Beirut, August 29 – Residents of Israel’s tiny northern neighbor voiced puzzlement today regarding ...
Read More »Russians Leak Result Of Israeli Election 3 Weeks Prematurely
An official from Russia’s intelligence agency admitted his organization failed to maintain adequate data security. Moscow, August 29 – Officials in the administration of President Vladimir Putin voiced embarrassment today following the accidental release of the outcome of the upcoming ...
Read More »Authorities Unable To Enforce Government Monopoly On Stupidity
The government remains peerless in the production, management, and delivery of stupidity. Jerusalem, August 28 – Concern has increased in recent months regarding illegal engagement in blockhead policy-making and decisions, officials acknowledged today, following the publication of a report yesterday ...
Read More »Hamas Claims Credit For Burning Amazon With Incendiary Balloons
President Jair Bolsonaro has established close ties with Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, making his country a legitimate target in Palestinian and Islamist eyes. Brasilia, August 27 – The Islamist movement governing the Gaza Strip that uses kites, helium balloons, ...
Read More »Safety Precautions Force Nasrallah To Conduct Conjugal Visits Via Skype
A Hezbollah spokesman disclosed this development as part of an information campaign by the organization to project a more realistic image than before, including footage of facilities destroyed in Israeli strikes. Beirut, August 26 – The chief of Iran’s main ...
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