“Bombastic denunciations of Israel are always welcome, but that doesn’t put suicide bomber vests on the working Palestinian’s table.” Ramallah, January 7 – Palestinian lawmakers reacted with anger and frustration to President Mahmoud Abbas’s announcement last week disbanding the legislature, but promised ...
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Confusion As Virtue Signaler Displays Actual Virtue
“My understanding has always been that ethical behavior was something you only demanded of others.” Tel Aviv, January 2 – Activists and media figures voiced bewilderment today following a display of real, verifiable moral fiber and character on the part of ...
Read More »Canada Vows Census Of US Nerds’ Girlfriends You Don’t Know
The existence of such adolescent girls in Canada has been attested to for several decades in statements provided under interrogation by American nerds to cooler classmates. Ottawa, January 3 – The government of Prime Minister Justin Trudeau promised today to ...
Read More »Terrorists Neglect Training, Mesmerized By Livni-Gabbay Drama
Under normal circumstances this week’s political developments in Israel would receive a shrug from Islamists. Bint Jbail, Lebanon, January 2 – Islamist militants opposed to Israel’s existence have forgotten what they were doing and have become absorbed in the unfolding ...
Read More »Why Have Palestinians Been Ethnically Cleansed From ‘The Flintstones’?
By Linda Sarsour, rights activist Brooklyn, January 1 – It’s bad enough that Palestinians in real life have suffered displacement, persecution, and Othering, but when those phenomena extend even to the realm of beloved children’s shows, we know our society ...
Read More »Study: Haredim Poor Because Won’t Handle Shekel Notes With Images Of Women
The Bank of Israel and the Ministry of Finance appear to have ignored the Law of Unintended Consequences. Bnei Brak, December 31 – Researchers have identified a key factor in the economic challenges that face ultra-orthodox Jews in Israel, according ...
Read More »Hamas Grant Writer Inflating Achievements In Funding Report To Qatar
The report includes a colorful chart showing embezzlement of large sums from Qatari aid by Hamas leaders as “Infrastructure Investment.” Doha, Qatar, December 26 – An office staffer in the political echelon of the militant Islamist organization that governs the ...
Read More »Parties Surprised To Learn Former General In Ranks Not A Requirement
“It had always bothered me that certain parties seemed to flout that law and no one said anything about it.” Jerusalem, December 27 – High-ranking officials in Israel’s various political parties gearing up for elections this coming April voiced astonishment ...
Read More »Kids In Poverty Realize Santa Hates Them
“It’s quite a departure from the Saint Nick of yore.” Nazareth, December 26 – Children from economically disadvantaged families compared their Christmas presents today to those of better-off friends and neighbors and came to the conclusion that Kris Kringle must ...
Read More »Women’s March Lobbies FDR To Turn Away ‘Privileged’ MS St. Louis
The position dovetails with that of Secretary of State Cordell Hull and of civic organizations such as the Ku Klux Klan. Washington, December 25 – Leaders of a prominent progressive group sent letters today to US President Franklin Delano Roosevelt ...
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