By Cantor Anthony Weiner The days leading up to Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, always carry a special intensity. As one who leads the services in the synagogue on that solemn day, I am acutely aware of the need ...
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Feed SubscriptionPalestinians To Build Nuclear Overreactor
The favored scenario involves waiting for some minor Israeli action to be used as a pretext, then announcing the demolition of an ancient Jewish shrine where the overreactor will be built. Ramallah, September 25 – Officials of the Palestinian Authority have launched ...
Read More »Religious Parties Threaten To Topple Government If Knesset Not Gender-Segregated
“It’s only fitting that the place that shares its name with the Hebrew term for a synagogue be governed by similar rules.” Jerusalem, September 24 – Leaders of the ultra-orthodox parties in Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu’s governing coalition flexed their ...
Read More »Report: Competent Kurdish State Will Cause Instability, Palestinian Terror State Just Fine
The Middle East isn’t used to competent administration; it would be irresponsible to introduce such a thing. Mosul, September 24 – Analysts from a cadre of nations and entities monitoring the fluid, chaotic situation in the Middle East have concluded ...
Read More »Researchers Develop Strongest-Yet Virtue-Signaling Transmitter
“Soon, the wokest hot take on any development won’t just be the province of Slate, Vox, or Jezebel.” Tel Aviv, September 19 – Engineers and physicists working on a joint project between Tel Aviv University and the research departments of ...
Read More »Abbas Acting As Statesman At UNGA Not Eligible For This Year’s Emmys
“If previous UNGA performances provide any indication, Mr. Abbas will give other candidates a run for their money.” New York, September 19 – The Palestinian President’s tour-de-force acting performance in the role of a responsible, honorable human being and national political ...
Read More »Community In Uproar Over Discovery That ‘Tashlich’ Not About Feeding Ducks, Fish
“This is an outrage,” wrote one prominent community member on Facebook. West Hempstead, NY, September 18 – Hundreds of Jews will gather this coming Thursday afternoon at Hall’s Pond for an annual Rosh Hashanah ritual that demonstrates a desire to ...
Read More »Please Stop Blaming Jews For The Things We Supervillains Do
By Lex Luthor If there’s one thing a supervillain wants, it’s publicity. The whole thing with the logo, the hairdo, the costume, the sinister name – it’s all to generate hype. Fear, of course, and respect, but sustained public attention ...
Read More »Prisons To Pipe Bad Covers Of Inmates’ Favorite Songs Into Cells
The practice has broken numerous prisoners, assisting the security forces in foiling impending terror attacks and helping maintain discipline within the prisons. Megiddo Prison, September 17 – Military and civilian incarceration facilities are set to expand a pilot program that ...
Read More »11-Year-Old Boy Volunteers To Mow Knesset’s Concrete Plaza
The plaza, which covers the area between the security gates and the entrance to the parliament building itself, features no plant life. Jerusalem, September 17 – Inspired by the civic spirit of an American preteen who volunteered to cut the ...
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