Western reluctance to act militarily to impair or stop the genocide occurring in Syria plays an important role in that argument. Aleppo, December 21 – Lack of political will around the globe to intervene in the bloodshed plaguing Syria is ...
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Feed SubscriptionJoint List MKs Sure There Was A Law That Permits Minorities To Commit Treason
If the effort succeeds, it may allow former MK Azmi Bishara to return from self-imposed exile in Qatar. Jerusalem, December 20 – Members of the Joint List alliance of mostly Arab parties in the Knesset spent Monday in an intense ...
Read More »Joseph Wondering Where The Hell Basel Ghattas Is With That Damn Phone
While conditions for Joseph in the prison are less brutal than for most prisoners, his situation remains far worse than the prisoners Ghattas has helped with his smuggling. Memphis Prison Facility, Egypt, December 19 – A Hebrew servant incarcerated for ...
Read More »US Urges Israel To Put Amona Evacuees In Reservations
“The State should spend generations deceiving them, depriving them, and occasionally throwing them a bone or two.” Washington, December 19 – Top American diplomats recommended that Israel follow the United States’ lead in treatment of people forcibly removed from areas ...
Read More »Judah Relieved Tamar Episode Won’t Be Taught In Day Schools
Tamar was unavailable for comment; a member of the household chastised reporters for disturbing her recovery from a difficult birth of twins. Adullam, Canaan, December 18 – Jacob’s fourth son and a leader of the emerging people of Israel expressed ...
Read More »Abbas Rails Against Jacob’s Sons For ‘Defiling’ Palestinian Pit With Joseph
The Morabitoun, as they will be known, with their female counterparts the Morabitat, will attempt to obstruct Jacob and his offspring from performing Talmudic rituals that threaten or undermine Palestine’s sanctity. Ramallah, December 18 – Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas had ...
Read More »Joseph, You Know That One Of Those Eleven Stars Is Technically A Planet, Right?
By Judah Joe, the guys are not pleased with your delusions of grandeur, and I can’t say I disagree. Aside from the fact that it’s just dangerously destabilizing to go boasting about visions of your own superiority over us, it’s ...
Read More »Pharaoh Rejects Call To Adopt IHRA Definition Of Antisemitism
Egyptian nationalists and the alt-right voiced satisfaction with the royal decision. Memphis, December 14 – The ruler of the Egyptian Empire today dismissed calls for his government to accept a definition of anti-Jewish rhetoric that includes some kinds of criticism ...
Read More »Calls For Cain’s Resignation After Reports He Slept With His Sister
“No one who conducts himself that way can continue to serve as firstborn.” Eden, December 15 – Scandal erupted today in Adam and Eve’s family after their eldest son was accused of seducing his sister, and calls emerged for Cain ...
Read More »Non-Priests Ask For TL;DR Version Of Leviticus
“We don’t need to know where the blood of an animal gets applied to the altar, or which internal organs get burned.” Wilderness of Sinai, December 15 – A coalition of Israelites representing all of the tribes but Levi petitioned ...
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