If, however, the target proved to be other than Jews or people obviously acting in support of Jews, the US might consider a reprimand. Tehran, August 9 – President Hassan Rouhani of Iran told a gathering of lawmakers today that ...
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Feed SubscriptionRabbis Unsure Whether Avocado A Fruit Or A Turd
The session ended with the assembled scholars remaining deadlocked. Jerusalem, August 8 – Consensus continues to elude authorities on Jewish law as to the proper classification of the avocado, and whether the produce should be considered a fruit, requiring certain ...
Read More »JNF Shifts To Planting Only Gharqad Trees
“We intend to have over five million in place by 2030.” Jerusalem Forest, August 8 – In what organization executives are calling a strategic move aimed at enhancing both the ecology and defense of the country, the Jewish National Fund ...
Read More »Tubal-Cain Wins Contract To Develop ‘Bronze Dome’ Defense System
Tubal-Cain’s half-brothers Jabal and Jubal also made important advances in their respective fields of animal husbandry and acoustics. Ur, August 7 – A local metallurgy pioneer has secured an agreement with the government to develop and produce a weapons system ...
Read More »My Distant Ancestors In Arabia Were The First Palestinians
By Saeb Erekat I have had quite enough of the Zionist trope that “Jews are from Judea; Arabs are from Arabia.” It’s nice and pat, and pretty straightforward, but it pointedly neglects the fact that my distant ancestors in Arabia ...
Read More »Unprecedented Trouble For 2016 Games Definitely Mossad’s Doing
“I think we all know who stands to gain from disaster on an international scale.” Rio de Janeiro, August 3 – This year’s Olympic Summer Games, scheduled to open on August 5, have seen a level of controversy and mismanagement unmatched ...
Read More »Zoabi In Critical Condition After Being Left In Hot Car
When asked why Zoabi apparently did not attempt to let herself out of the car, Tibi became incensed. “Why are you blaming the victim?” Hadassah Ein Kerem Medical Center, August 3 – Joint List MK Hannen Zoabi was listed in ...
Read More »New Qatari Comedy Show Imagines BDS Caring About Arab Slavery
“It’s a realm no one has really ventured into before, and that’s what provides the whole comic gestalt.” Doha, August 4 – Producers of a new series slated for the Al-Jazeera network hope to make audiences laugh with the absurd ...
Read More »God Unsure How To Handle Prayers From Opposing Sports Teams
Observers note that while the Washington team apparently prayed with greater fervency, the Rutherford Team outdid them in imagining the positive consequences for their loved ones. Little Rock, AR – Two high school football teams playing against each other have each ...
Read More »‘Boycotting 101’ Prof Forced To Pass Student Who Boycotted Course
Professor Failim devoted extensive attention to the BDS movement and encouraged her students to support it. Tel Aviv, August 3 – A Tel Aviv University faculty member who gave a failing grade to a student who boycotted his course on ...
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