“He continues to surprise us with his, shall we say, unique interpretation of what is and is not proper in this setting.” Jerusalem, May 5 – A Member of Knesset known for courting controversy has provoked critics again, this time ...
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Feed SubscriptionHey, Picot, You Have To Come See The Middle East Now
By Mark Sykes, British Diplomat François? You have to see this, François. Look at the areas of the former Ottoman Empire in 2016. Look at the countries we essentially created with a swipe of the pen a hundred years ago. You ...
Read More »Suicide Bomber Attack At Mos Eisley Cantina
A Hamas poster named the bomber as Jarjar al-Binki, 25, of the Shati refugee camp in the Gaza Strip. Mos Eisley, Tatooine, May 4 – A Palestinian suicide bomber detonated his explosive belt inside a landmark watering hole last night, ...
Read More »Bob The Builder Named In Settlement Construction Probe
The allegations may adversely affect the new animated series of Mr. the Builder’s chronicles. Tel Aviv, May 3 – Anti-settlement activists are accusing a prominent international entertainer of actively working on homes for Israeli Jews in areas Palestinians claim for ...
Read More »Holocaust Denier Notes Bible Suspiciously Doesn’t Mention It
“You won’t find it in the Talmud or medieval Jewish sources either.” London, May 2 – Controversial historian Brane Liss pressed his case that the Holocaust was faked, citing the telling lack of any such event in the canonical Jewish texts ...
Read More »Palestinians Cite ‘I Called It First’ Rule To Establish Title To Land
Prominent personalities already noted that calling “Shotgun!” is an accepted method for establishing the right to sit in the front passenger seat of a motor vehicle. Ramallah, May 2 – Referring to a principle commonly invoked in settling certain types of ...
Read More »May 1: Gov’ts Issue Postage Stamp With Large-Font List Of Successful Communist Regimes
It will be available at post offices the entire month of May, or until hoarders and black marketeers make them unobtainable by standard means. London, May 1 – In honor of the international socialist workers’ holiday on this date, governments around ...
Read More »Livni’s Expense Account Sees Uptick In Deodorant Purchases
“Not that there’s anything here that smells wrong.” Jerusalem, April 27 – The Knesset Comptroller’s Office has noticed an increase in the amount of deodorant bought by MK Tzipi Livni in the last three weeks, Knesset observers have reported. The ...
Read More »I Hope That Red Sea Incident Doesn’t Raise My Chariot Insurance Premiums
By Thutmose III, Ruler of Egypt We all have accidents on the roads, even the best drivers. Sometimes circumstances are simply beyond a driver’s control. Given that fact, I’m relying on the insurance company writing off the loss of my ...
Read More »Shock As Soldiers Not Arrested For Shooting Attackers
Yaalon said the IDF cannot sink to the level of its enemies by actually killing people. Kalandia Checkpoint, April 27 – Hours after a pair of Palestinian siblings attacked soldiers here with knives and were shot in the attempt, the ...
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