The minister dismissed the accusations and said Zoabi was trying to generate attention, play victim, and exacerbate ethnic tensions, which he called dangerously irresponsible. Jerusalem, July 19 – Minister of Absorption and Jerusalem Affairs Ze’ev Elkin of Likud faces accusations ...
Read More »Author Archives: Swidler
Feed SubscriptionAmid Yemen Strife, UNHRC To Hold Urgent Cocktail Party
“Even if it takes associating with some of the most notorious names in entertainment, we know we just have to do our jobs.” Geneva, July 15 – More than 1600 civilians have been killed in the ongoing Saudi-led offensive against ...
Read More »Israeli Startup Creates Popular BDS-Coordinating Apps
“By selling our product and follow-on support to BDS movement coordinators from here in Israel, we recouped the initial investment capital within six months of going to market.” Herzliya Pituach, July 17 – Amid the dense concentration of high-tech companies ...
Read More »EU Prepares Bailout Plan For Impending US Moral Bankruptcy
The US has sustained damage to its morality stocks before, but not to the extent that it nearly undermined the entire moral framework of the society. Brussels, July 16 – Fresh off a new agreement with Greece to restructure the bailout ...
Read More »Rabbinate’s Kosher Supervisors Qualify As Iran Inspectors
“The nuclear inspection program could be a wonderful opportunity for our underemployed supervisors.” Jerusalem, July 16 – The International Atomic Energy Agency announced today that in keeping with the leniency shown to Iran under the recent Vienna agreement, inspections of ...
Read More »Mossad Satisfied At World Distracted By So-Called ‘Pluto’
The several bona fide astronauts who have gone to outer space have all been Israeli agents performing maintenance on the machines that control what the rest of humanity sees when they look at the so-called sky. Laurel, Maryland, July 15 ...
Read More »Savings? Not When We’re Going To Get Nuked Anyway
By Moshe Kahlon, Minister of Finance Let me get this straight: you want me to worry about affordable housing, the cost of living, defense expenditures, struggling Holocaust survivors, fiscal responsibility, and a crumbling health care system, while none of that ...
Read More »Opposition Claims Bibi Omnipotent: ‘Could Have Prevented Iran Deal’
The Left’s defeats have left Labor and its allies feeling that Netanyahu must be able to bend reality to his will. Jerusalem, July 14 – Israeli Opposition lawmakers expressed dismay that Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu had failed to prevent the international ...
Read More »Rapper 50 Cent Promoted In Israel As 1.89 Shekel
“We always go the extra 1.60934 kilometers for our entertainment partners.” Tel Aviv, July 13 – An Israeli entertainment marketing contractor is facing confusion from fans and anger from its overseas client after converting rap artist 50 Cent’s name into the ...
Read More »Students For Justice In Palestine Accidentally Boycotts Self
Those chapters will be hamstrung in their efforts to reestablish themselves as members of the organization in good standing. Urbana-Champaign, Illinois, July 13 – An anti-Israel student group sowed confusion today when the chapter president announced that, in what appeared ...
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