The black hole only attracts new construction materials, as the piles of rubble remaining from last summer’s carnage remain untouched. Kerem Shalom Crossing, July 5 – Thousands of tons of cement, ceramics, and assorted other construction materials for rebuilding the ...
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Feed SubscriptionStudy: In Theory, Arab MKs Able To Represent Israeli Arabs, Not Palestinians
The study also found that MK Basel Ghattas had a sick tan for someone who is supposed to be a legislator in the Knesset, a mostly indoor facility. Umm El-Fahm, July 1 – A team of researchers at Tel Aviv ...
Read More »Israel Suppressing Islamic Culture By Reducing Honor Killings
The conference called on international bodies such as UNESCO to protect the cherished practice from Israeli “cultural genocide.” Jerusalem, July 2 – Islamic scholars and leaders gathered in the Jordanian capital city of Amman to denounce Israel for suppressing the ancient ...
Read More »Blaming Jews For Crisis Mysteriously Ineffective In Saving Greece
“In prewar Germany, blaming Jews was an essential element of the economic system that pulled the country out of the Great Depression.” Athens, July 2 – Accusing Jewish bankers and currency speculators of being behind Greece’s recent monetary woes has ...
Read More »Suicide Bomber Denied 72 Virgins; Forgot To Yell ‘Allahu Akbar’
He will be allowed to watch as others are provided their allotment of six dozen virgins. Rafah, Egypt, July 1 – Mustafa Ali Al-Masri, 22, blew himself up in this Egyptian border town today, injuring six paramilitary police, but will not ...
Read More »UN: Israeli Missile Alert System Exempts Hamas From Warning Civilians
“It was not quite sufficient to interpret mocking, threatening Hamas video clips as warnings, so the Council felt compelled to shore up the idea that Hamas warned Israeli civilians with this finding.” Geneva, July 1 – The United Nations Human ...
Read More »Excuse Me Mr. ISIS Jail Guard, But I Only Eat Gluten-Free
By Prisoner 3445509 Yoo hoo! Excuse me! Mr. guard? Over here, yes, the second cell from the end. Thank you for these rations. They look nourishing. But you know, I avoid gluten. Would it be possible to get something not ...
Read More »Saudis Say Mossad Broke Into Cave Of Wonders, Stole Lamp
Unconfirmed reports in Saudi media claimed eyewitnesses had seen a group of people flying a magic carpet away from the scene, but that could not be corroborated. Riyadh, June 29 – Saudi officials accused Israel today of stealing the contents ...
Read More »Archaeologists Unearth Oldest ‘Shimon Peres Is So Old’ Joke
The new discovery pushes back the currency of the trope a further four hundred years, making it almost as old as Peres. Mareisha, Israel, June 24 – Researchers excavating a site from the period of the Biblical King David have discovered ...
Read More »EU Enlists Rufus Scrimgeour To Pretend To Handle Islamist Threat
“It’s exactly the kind of cosmetic change that we at the EU have always preferred when addressing fundamental, even existential, challenges.” Brussels, June 28 – The European Union has engaged the former Minister of Magic to help the alliance create the ...
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