It’s been several weeks into this dark journey aimed at preserving all animal life on land, and I’m having second thoughts over this decision to allow entry to certain species of stinging insects. Creatures aboard my ark are barred from ...
Read More »Author Archives: Swidler
Feed SubscriptionHolocaust Denier Denies Not Denying Holocaust
Tehran, October 23 – A senior Iranian official today denied reports that he had failed to deny the Holocaust, attempting to fend off criticism from political rivals intent on denying him support. Maher Shalalhashbaz, a regional governor, told reporters he ...
Read More »Elvis Presley To Play Israel In May 2015
Tel Aviv, October 22 – Music fans in Israel will be treated to four live shows by legendary rock musician Elvis Presley this coming spring, local promoters announced today. King Promotions, a Tel-Aviv-based agency, announced that in May next year, ...
Read More »Angry Nazis: We Got Tried For Killing Jews, But Gaza Gets Billions
Vienna, Austria, October 22 – Surviving members of the Nazi Party and SS-run killing squads across Europe voiced displeasure this week over what they called the international community’s double standard in rewarding Hamas with financial aid for attacking Jews while ...
Read More »Palestinian Economy To Boom After Getting $5.4B In Berlin Milkies
Chief Palestinian Negotiator Saeb Erekat called a press conference today to announce that the Palestinian unity government had raised $5.4 Billion worth of Berlin Milkies. “The resale profit from Milkies sold here in the Zionist Entity should enable every PA ...
Read More »Archaeologists Find The Synagogue King David Would Not Attend
“…this house of prayer to YHWH our God, made by the King David so that the king use the other house of prayer located…” Jerusalem, October 20 – Excavators working to the south of the Old City have discovered what ...
Read More »‘Babes Of Hamas’ Pinup Calendar Selling Poorly
Gaza City, October 19 – An attempt to raise funds for Hamas’s military wing via the sale of a calendar featuring attractive Muslim women has produced poor results, a spokesman for the movement conceded today. The “Babes of Hamas” pinup ...
Read More »I Also Think The Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Caused Ebola
By US Secretary of State John Kerry You Israelis are so hypersensitive. You overreact to every little distortion, every little indication that I’ve swallowed the big Palestinian lie hook, line, and sinker. But you should save your bile for when ...
Read More »Iran On Texas Execution Rate: ‘Bloody Amateurs’
“Wannabe Texas can’t even manage one per week. That would be comical if it weren’t so downright lame.” Tehran, October 16 – Officials in Iran expressed disdain for the supposed cruelty of Texas’s criminal justice system today, calling the Lone ...
Read More »UK Also Votes To Symbolically Recognize Vichy France
London, October 15 – Following a vote in the House of Commons Monday to grant symbolic recognition to a Palestinian state, Parliament passed a similar non-binding motion to grant the same recognition to the Pétain government of Nazi-occupied France. The ...
Read More »