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Jews To Expand Use Of Gentile Blood To Cookies, Pizza

Jews To Expand Use Of Gentile Blood To Cookies, Pizza

Jerusalem, October 13 – After focusing for nearly a thousand years on the ritual inclusion of non-Jewish blood in their Passover unleavened bread, Jews have begun to broaden their use of the special substance in other foodstuffs beyond the strictly ...

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City Famous For Beheadings Horrified At Beheading Plot

City Famous For Beheadings Horrified At Beheading Plot

London, October 10 – The city most closely associated with monarchs ordering people’s heads severed from the rest of their bodies expressed shock and horror this week after authorities allegedly uncovered an Islamist plot to perform the same act on ...

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Ministry Of Douchebaggery Extends Shirtless Jogging Season

Ministry Of Douchebaggery Extends Shirtless Jogging Season

Tel Aviv, October 9 – Minister of Douchebaggery Aluf Arss introduced a new douchebag timetable yesterday morning, announcing that jogging or otherwise engaging in public athletic activity while shirtless would be officially sanctioned through November and December, and resume in ...

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Budget Concerns Prompt IDF To Put Ads On Sides Of Tanks

Budget Concerns Prompt IDF To Put Ads On Sides Of Tanks

Ramat Hasharon, Israel, October 6 – Tensions over a proposed increase in military spending as part of the 2015 government budget have forced the Ministry of Defense and Israel Defense Force to seek revenue outside the standard military budget, leading ...

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