June 27 – Topographers at the Palestine Institute of Geography (PIG) have published a study indicating that the altitude of Palestinian societal thoroughfares locally considered morally elevated are nevertheless less elevated than the lower routes of other societies. A PIG ...
Read More »Author Archives: Swidler
Feed SubscriptionMuslims: Israel Taking Forever To Destroy Al-Aqsa Already
Jerusalem, June 25 – Palestinian religious scholars and military experts alike remain baffled at Israel’s continued failure to mount an actual effort to destroy the Al-Aqsa Mosque, despite years of warnings by Palestinian and Arab leaders that such attempts are ...
Read More »China ‘Smashes’ 32 Terrorist Groups; World Reacts By Slamming Israel
Xinjiang, China, June 25 – Persistent unrest in this heavily Muslim region has led Chinese authorities to crack down on the native Uighur population, killing at least 13 and sentencing hundreds more to incarceration or execution, leading the United Nations ...
Read More »Report: Levels On Which BDS Wrong Up 20%
Tel Aviv, June 24 – Scientists at Tel Aviv University are reporting that the Boycott, Divest, Sanctions movement against Israel, already wrong on so many levels, has somehow increased the number of planes on which its activities and attitudes violate ...
Read More »Rescue The Abducted Boys? You’re Not Allowed To Do That! Help! UN!
By Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas Look, I’m sorry. You guys caught a tough break when Hamas kidnapped those three teenagers, but you can’t come barging in here to try to find them. You have to let them slowly rot as ...
Read More »Tel Aviv Hospital Under Fire For Violating Apartheid Policy
Ramallah, June 22 – Palestinian officals are accusing an Israeli medical facility of failing to live up to the characterization of Apartheid that the Palestinains and their supporters demand of the Jewish State. According to those officials, Assuta, a private ...
Read More »Israel To Install Revolving Doors On Prisons
Ofer Prison, North of Jerusalem, June 21 – Jailers at this military facility are preparing to replace the high-security gates and doors under their control with a set of revolving doors, which will better suit the government’s recent policy of ...
Read More »Ban Unsure Whether Youths Kidnapped, Pope Catholic
New York, June 20 – One week after issuing an announcement calling for the return of three teenage Israeli abductees, United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon is still not officially sure the three were actually kidnapped, despite boasts to that effect ...
Read More »White House Finally Chimes In On Missing Israelis
Washington, June 19 – First Lady Michelle Obama stepped into the political fray over the three kidnapped Israeli teens today, posting a photo to Twitter with her holding a sign referring to the abduction. The content of the sign served ...
Read More »Lack Of Calls For Bloody Revenge Confirms Jews Alien To Middle East
Ramallah, June 18 – Arab thinkers and activists alike are pointing to Israeli society’s collective, low-venom reaction to the kidnapping of three teenagers by Hamas as further evidence that the Jews are foreigners in the region and have no legitimate ...
Read More »