PreOccupied Territory The News In Advance. Barely.

Jerusalem, January 30 – Jerusalem Mayor Nir Barkat has announced that he is empowering municipal workers and concerned citizens to shoot the owners of dogs that leave excrement on the ground and neglect to clean it up within minutes. Barkat ...

Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, January 29 – The Saudi government announced today it will outlaw women, calling them a threat to the moral fabric of society. As of February 1, anyone in possession of a woman will face fines or imprisonment, ...

New York, NY (AP) – Meeting behind closed doors because of what others might think of them, the United Nations Insecurity Council took up the matter of the violence in and around the West Bank and Gaza Strip, and wound ...

By Mahmoud Abbas, Palestinian Authority President Binyamin Netanyahu has once again raised a non-starter of an idea: let the Israeli settlers remain in their settlements after the land is transferred to the emerging state of Palestine. Of course we Palestinians ...

The world has long since become used to the idea of euphemistically named programs to kill Jews: the Final Solution; Intifada; Resistance to the Occupation. Ramallah, West Bank, January 26 – Seeking to bolster his standing among Palestinians and wary ...

Jerusalem, January 26 – Israeli lawmakers approved obnoxiously proposed legislation on Sunday allocating money for a variety of inappropriate activities. The Inappropriations Law determines which of the rude items in the annual budget will receive funding, from how-to classes on ...

New York, January 24 (Duh) – Jewish leaders are reeling in the wake of the discovery that there are functioning Jewish communities beyond the New York area. It has long been accepted that individual or small groups of Jews might ...

Davos, Switzerland, January 23 – President Hassan Rouhani of Iran put forth a more diplomatic face today, telling reporters and dignitaries that his country would pursue its aims through a careful course of action, one of “constructive engagement” with the ...

Traffic inside the D.C. Beltway was not disrupted. Washington, January 23 – Two years since the start of an uprising against Basher Al-Assad’s rule, millions of people did not gather in public places across the U.S. to demand that the ...

By Iver Mikhshol, Municipal Sign Approval Commission No storefront business is complete without an attractive sign out front. And no such business will open in this town unless it contains at least one glaring error in English. Guaranteed! Municipal law ...