By Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) Dearborn, March 9 – Here in the Twelfth Congressional District, we have our work cut out for us. This once-prospering, working-class area of Detroit used to boast manufacturing jobs that put the American dream within ...
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Feed SubscriptionMan Scoffs At Needing Purim As Pretext For Getting Plastered
“No one needs to hear how righteous you are when we all know you’re only interested in chugging enough liquor to pass out and maybe throw up six or seven times along the way.” Jerusalem, March 8 – A resident ...
Read More »Ancient Scroll Chronicling Thwarted Genocide Of Jews Adduced As Evidence Of ‘Jewish Supremacy’
“They didn’t have to kill thousands of people who were going to kill them. They could have shot them in the leg.” Brighton, March 7 – Anti-Israel activists cited the sacred Hebrew text at the heart of today’s observance of ...
Read More »Ancient, Historic Palestine Magically Never Exceeded 1916 Borders
The native population remained anchored to the land through thick and thin and defining themselves as the children of it so thoroughly that the term “Palestine” never passed their lips. Jerusalem, February 23 – Since time immemorial, the indigenous people ...
Read More »78th Shooting Attack On Jews: LAPD Still Unsure Motive Antisemitic
Jews have a tendency to see attacks on them as motivated by hate for Jews, which is only true in about 98% of cases. Los Angeles, March 2 – The Los Angeles Police Department voiced reluctance today to classify the ...
Read More »Vandalism Of Dorm Rooms Really Took Rothschilds Down A Peg
The man also expressed the hope that, as with the vast majority of attacks on Jews in the Western world, the pork-smearing and mezuzah-removing operation will help to free Palestine. Denver, March 2 – Two weeks after antisemites tore ritual ...
Read More »Opposition Brings Howler Monkeys To Committee Meeting, Improves Decorum
“Can we get someone to clean the monkey poop off the- oh, sorry again, that’s just the Opposition’s comments on the Judicial Reform Bill. It’s getting so hard to tell the difference.” Jerusalem, March 1 – Legislators sought to execute ...
Read More »Survey: Jerusalemites Naturally Skeptical From Constant Encounter With ‘Optimistic’ Public Works Timelines
Strong evidence points to the fist light rail line in the city as the onset of the phenomenon. Jerusalem, February 28 – A new study has found that residents of Israel’s capital show a better-than-average capacity for critical thinking and ...
Read More »Zionism Is Bad Because Nationalism Is Bad But Not Palestinian Nationalism Because Reasons
By Ayama Dumfuq, campus Palestine activist New York, February 27 – To avoid accusations that we anti-Zionists hold antisemitic views, we are forced to claim that we oppose the Jewish State in principle not because we want to deny Jews ...
Read More »Centuries Of Arab Antisemitism Explained By Recent Existence Of Israel
“Otherwise, we would expect to see media reports mention the longstanding antisemitism in the region as a factor in the conflict, but they invariably do not.” Amman, February 26 – Antipathy across the region for Jews going back at least ...
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