Biggest Success Of Anti-Israel Resistance: Causing Israel To Take Even More Land

“It’s amazing what we can achieve when we really try.”

Jabalia, Gaza Strip, January 1 – A review by multiple allied factions in the anti-Zionist militant movement has found that the hundred-year-old endeavor’s greatest achievement, bar none, involves sparking Zionist territorial expansion to an extent not possible without the anti-Zionist terrorist enterprise.

Representatives of Hamas, Palestinian Islamic Jihad, Hezbollah, Amal, The Palestine Liberation Organization, the Houthis, the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps, and half a dozen other groups engaged in “the Resistance” concluded at a strategic confab this week that the Resistance’s greatest achievement, more then any body count or political gains, more than ant seizure of power or international influence, more than any supposed attainment of Palestinian sovereignty, is the fomenting of Israeli operations to take and hold more areas than the Zionists might otherwise occupy.

“It’s without a doubt the most notable outcome of this five-generation effort,” stated IRGC delegate Abad Faqqap. “If you go back to the series of rejections of partition plans in the 1930’s and 1940’s, you see the beginnings of it, the outcome of the no-compromise approach of the 1920’s. Each proposed partition, which the Arab leaders rejected and the Jews accepted, allotted greater and territory to the proposed Jewish state in British Mandate Palestine.”

“Then,” continued Faqqap, “a civil war began between Jews and Arabs in Palestine, as the Arabs rejected the last UN resolution that offered partition. Well, in the ensuing months, the Jews secured areas they never would have had otherwise, though they lost some, too. But then, when Israel declared statehood in May 1948, and surrounding Arab armies attacked, the outcome was a Jewish state in control of much more territory than it would have had under even the most ‘generous’ partition plans.”

Hezbollah delegate Hauda Tayyebls Tourn nodded and continued the narrative. “In 1967 all the Arab countries started making noises again about wiping Israel off the map,” he recalled. “Egypt blocked the Straits of Tiran, an act of war; Syria threatened to divert Israel’s main water supply. They all mobilized and vowed another war of extermination.”

“Then Israel hit first and took the Sinai and Gaza from Egypt,” he added. “Then the West Bank from Jordan. Then the Golan Heights from Syria. So yeah, that’s been the model. Egypt got back the Sinai when they made peace, which demonstrates the contrapositive of the phenomenon we’re discussing.” He noted that a similar reverse process occurred, to a lesser degree, with Israeli-Palestinian self-rule agreements of the 1990’s.

“Which brings us to today,” chimed in Hamas spokesman Fawzi Bals. “Our plan for the Al Aqsa Flood was for Hezbollah to attack from the north and we’d take over all of historic Palestine from the Jews. It hasn’t quite worked out that way. Now Hezbollah is a shell of its former self, we’re on the ropes in Gaza, our patron Iran is on the verge of collapse, Israel now holds land in Lebanon AND Syria…”

“It’s amazing what we can achieve when we really try,” he mused.

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