“We can’t even do that job by ourselves. We need Russian air power just to kill our own.” Damascus, March 29 – Veterans and observers of Baser Assad’s forces have noticed a steady diminishment in the motivation of those forces ...
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Feed SubscriptionCorbyn, Allies Slam IDF For Blocking Shipment Of Flowers To Terrorist Graves
“Israel’s thwarting of the delivery can only be seen as cruelty for the sake of cruelty.” London, March 20 – Prominent figures in Britain’s Labour Party expressed outrage today upon learning that several bouquets they had dispatched to the Palestinian Territories ...
Read More »Dominant Group Representing 96% Of Region’s Population Depicted As Underdog
Israel’s Arab and Muslim foes have been relegated to an area barely more than a hundred times Israel’s size, and they feel the squeeze. Jerusalem, March 9 – An ethnic cohort composing the overwhelming majority of the Middle East’s demographics ...
Read More »Syrian Victims Of Putin Atrocities Just Accept They Don’t Deserve Same Support As Ukraine
“At least Palestinians have the support of antisemites who astroturf that cause, because it opposes Jewish safety.” Idlib, March 20 – Residents of this Arab Republic who lost loved ones to aerial bombing by Russia’s air force, or who suffered ...
Read More »Mossad Makes Palestinian Toilet Seats Extra-Cold In Winter
Israel allows non-military items to enter Gaza without restriction, and Hamas officials suspect the Mossad has exploited that unrestricted importation channel to administer torture. Gaza City, February 17 – Counterintelligence operatives of the Islamist movement that governs this coastal territory ...
Read More »Jew-Hater Can’t Decide Whether Israel Deprived Palestinians Of Vaccines Or Vaccines A Jewish Mind-Control Plot
“I can’t have it both ways, and I’m having a hard time picking which one offers more in terms of attention and emotional valence.” Hebron, Palestinian Territories, February 8 – A conspiracy-minded local resident finds himself caught between two conflicting ...
Read More »Arrow Missile Successfully Intercepts Proposal To Cut Exorbitant IDF Pensions
Analysts cautioned that the interception of the threat today does not guarantee other threats to cushy pensions will not emerge. Tel Aviv, January 27 – Senior military officials and officers congratulated one another today on a successful demonstration of an innovative, airborne threat-neutralization ...
Read More »Lack Of Gaza Flooding This Rainy Season May Deprive Propagandists Of Chance To Accuse Israel Of Opening Dams
Hamas’s diversion of aid materials and funds from public works to its own military purposes translates into inadequate drainage for the Gaza Strip. Gaza City, January 19 – Palestinian public figures prominent pro-Palestine activists warned today that this winter’s precipitation ...
Read More »Surgical Mask Fails To Protect Terrorist From Bullet
Palestinian public health authorities now worry that confidence in their pronouncements and guidelines will suffer as a result. Kibbutz Kissufim, near the Gaza border, January 10 – A Hamas fighter who relied on guidance from Palestinian public health authorities in ...
Read More »Biden Admin Shocked Iran Still Fomenting Terror After Pinky-Swear
Malley and his team had assumed a pinky-swear from Iran’s negotiators signified a reliable commitment to change direction. Washington, December 30 – Senior American diplomatic officials voiced their dismay today upon discovering that despite extraction by those officials of a ...
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