“Mr. Kim has much to learn from us, and we are willing teachers.” Gaza City, June 14 – Openness that many hope will come in the aftermath of a summit between the leaders of the US and North Korea has ...
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Feed SubscriptionHamas Executing Human Shields Who Failed To Keep Its Men From Getting Shot
Al-Zahar declined to specify the number of designated human shield/martyrs slated for execution as a result of the fiasco. Gaza City, June 5 – The militant Islamist organization behind much of the rioting over the last several months at the ...
Read More »Stabbing, Bus-Bombing, Arson-Committing, Plane-Hijacking, Car-Ramming, Firebomb-Throwing, Civilian-Shooting, Violence-Inciting Palestinians Don’t Know What Else To Do To Convince You They’re Innocent Victims
“We have a hard time figuring out how the heck else to convey our innocent victim status through our behavior.” Ramallah, May 30 – Frustrated Palestinians engaged in wanton destruction of Israeli property and in malicious violence toward Jews cannot ...
Read More »Palestinian Already Interviewed 6 Times Since Killed By IDF
“I could barely get off the stretcher after the cameras stopped pointing at it.” Near the Erez Border Crossing, May 23 – A man slain at the hand of an Israeli sniper during disturbances at the fence separating the territory ...
Read More »Iranian Forces In Syria Having Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day
They think they’ll move to Afghanistan. Aleppo, May 10 – Shiite militias in Syria went to bed with a nuclear deal protecting them and now it’s blown up in their face and when they got out of bed this morning they ...
Read More »Gaza Mother Not Sure Her Baby Ready Yet To Throw Full-Size Molotov Cocktail
It marks the third such voluble exchange between Ali and Buthayna since the current wave of protests along the border with Israel began several weeks ago. Suja’iyya, Gaza Strip, May 2 – A local couple fell into fierce argument this ...
Read More »Cop Who Tried To Enforce Gun Laws Among Arabs Let Off With Warning This Time
The policewoman failed to appreciate the importance of knowing when to enforce the law and when to feign powerlessness or lack of resources. Beer Sheva, April 24 – A rookie policeman who arrested a Bedouin for a firearms violation faced ...
Read More »Terrorists Hoping To Elicit Threats From Lieberman As Sign They’re Safe
Lieberman pronounced in mid-April 2016 that were he minister of defense, the chief of Hamas in Gaza, Ismail Haniyeh, would be eliminated within forty-eight hours. Gaza City, April 23 – Leaders of the various militant factions opposed to Israel’s existence ...
Read More »IDF Summons Stay Puft Marshamallow Man To Stamp Out Gaza Riots
Witnesses recalled seeing the monster stomp toward the crowds of Palestinian protesters attempting to reach the border fence and breach it, scattering them. Kibbutz Nahal Oz, April 17 – Wary of permitting the “Great Return March” to continue attracting international ...
Read More »Outrage As Video Shows IDF Following Rules, Holding Fire Near Children
“IDF behavior must conform to the brutality standards the NGO community imputes to it, and not adhere to its own ethical code.” Tel Aviv, April 11 – Anger surfaced this week following a short clip of an Israeli military sniper aiming ...
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