Fighters, workers, and child laborers scurried out of the passages via shafts in homes, mosques, schools, and public health facilities. Khan Younis Refugee Camp, July 27 – Hundreds of Hamas personnel and civilian workers in the underground system crisscrossing this ...
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Feed SubscriptionTeacher No Longer Accepting ‘The Occupation’ As Homework Excuse
“We cannot allow this man to continue to poison the minds of our children.” Nablus, July 25 – Parents and students at the Yasser Arafat Primary School expressed outrage today that a fourth-grade teacher at the institution now refuses to excuse missed ...
Read More »Leningrad Appalled At Use Of Word ‘Siege’ To Describe Gaza
“Are bakeries in Gaza using a mixture of half flour and half sawdust?” Leningrad, Soviet Russia, July 20 – Residents of this city on the Baltic besieged by the Wehrmacht voiced outrage today upon being informed that Palestinian advocates would ...
Read More »Consistent Use Of Correct Hebrew Proves Man Is Foreign Spy
“He was using the right verb form for the third-person feminine plural future,” recalled an agent. Tel Aviv, July 13 – Investigators in Israeli counterintelligence have caught a foreign agent when the man unwittingly exposed himself by being the only person ...
Read More »Israel Increases Mining Of Dead Sea Salt For Taking With Amnesty Reports
“Entities such as Human Rights Watch, B’tselem, and various UN bodies have also contributed to increased demand for salt, and the industry has been more than happy to provide.” Kibbutz Ein Gedi, July 11 – Local officials at this community ...
Read More »Mandatory Sentence For Treating Injured Jews Reduced To Lynching
Analysts see the move as an encouraging sign of emerging liberal values in Palestinian society. Ramallah, July 7 – Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas signed an order today that sets a new, lighter mandatory punishment for people convicted of tendering ...
Read More »Study: Punishment Only Collective When Jews Impose It
Punishment is eight hundred times more likely to be “collective” when the negative treatment occurs at the hand of Jews. Davos, July 3 – A group of researchers examining the nature of Newtonian principles has discovered an ontological anomaly in ...
Read More »Egypt’s ‘Iron Pyramid’ System To Intercept Locusts, Hail
Pharaoh chose those plagues because they are the most likely to recur. Memphis, June 28 – Military engineers have been working day and night to develop technology for shielding the country against enemy plagues, a spokesman for pharaoh’s palace told ...
Read More »Palestinians Call Rahab Zionist Collaborator
Police officials said Rahab ran a brothel in the wall of the city. Jericho, June 23 – Palestinian security officials announced today they will seek the arrest of Rahab the harlot, whom they accuse of collaborating with the Zionist occupation ...
Read More »UN Blames Israel For Lousy Mobile Reception In Hamas Tunnels
“It would have been more humane to enable the doomed people trapped in tunnels to play, for example, Candy Crush.” Khan Yunis, June 19 – United Nations officials issued harsh criticism of Israel today for the sorry state of wireless ...
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