“One of the bedrock assumptions for Hamas must be that in any large-scale conflict with Israel, which has happened with some regularity over the last several years, they’re going to be bombed back to the stone age.” Gaza City, February 2 ...
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Feed SubscriptionSupervillain Concerned Hamas Tunnels Getting Near His Underground Lair
“I hope I don’t need to cause anymore tunnel collapses. The one last week was only because they got too close.” 800 meters underground somewhere near Suja’iya, February 1 – A criminal mastermind who maintains a secret facility far below Earth’s ...
Read More »Hamas Blames Death Of 7 In Tunnel On Delay Of Waaambulance
The trouble that resulted from the delay of the waaambulance resulted in the need for more waaambulances, trapping an ever-widening circle of participants in a self-generated disaster. Jabalia, Gaza Strip, January 27 – Gaza Ministry of Health officials said today ...
Read More »Blatt Dismissal A Setback For Zionist Global Domination
“Cleveland was the obvious choice of locale for avoiding unwanted attention. It’s the last place anyone thinks of in terms of anything important happening.” Cleveland, January 23 – Officials in Israel’s intelligence and security apparatus voiced concern today that the ...
Read More »High Winds In Gaza As Israel Activates Giant Fans On Border
Israel is the default party to blame for all misfortunes prior to corroborating such blame with evidence, if at all. Gaza City, January 18 (AFP) – Dust and air pollution reached much higher levels than normal today after Israel turned ...
Read More »Kerry Urges Israel To Describe Shalit Episode As ‘Positive’
“The torture, mutilation, and massacre of Israeli athletes at the 1972 Munich Olympics could be similarly treated,” he suggested. Washington, January 14 – US Secretary of State John Kerry followed up his characterization of Iran’s capture and release of American ...
Read More »Unlike Foes, Israel Stupidly Not Starving Its Enemies
“It’s more than a little puzzling that such a potent, proven tactic is simply not part of the Israeli military toolbox,” observed Jordanian General Krosmiya Naqilya. Tel Aviv, January 10 – Defense experts noted with some surprise today the fact that ...
Read More »Ecology-Minded Palestinians Send Children To Attack: ‘Renewable’
“It’s about a culture.” Beit F’jar, Palestinian Authority, January 5 – Environmental organizations praised Palestinian leaders today for their use of children and teens in attacks on Israel, noting that the phenomenon indicates the society’s awareness of the importance of ...
Read More »PLO To Kill 1000’s Of Palestinians So Israeli Genocide Looks Real
The fact that the killings will be by Palestinians, not Israelis or Jews, he called a technicality. “Israel will be blamed for it in the end in any case.” Ramallah, December 31 – Tired of population statistics not bearing out the oft-repeated ...
Read More »Palestinians Petition UNESCO Over Israeli Appropriation Of Terrorism
“It poses a serious challenge to the Palestinian sense of unique identity.” Paris, December 28 – Representatives of the Palestinian Authority submitted a formal complaint to the United Nations’ main cultural body today over some extremist Israelis’ use of terrorism, ...
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