Only by taking completely futile measures that no one of any consequence will even notice, let alone respect, can I hope to convey my frustration and disappointment to them. Jerusalem, October 20 – A voter who finds that none of the ...
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Feed SubscriptionMiami Boys’ Choir Declines Invitation To Sing US Anthem At Ball Game: ‘Too High’
“And the rockets red glare” and “O’er the land of the free.” New York, October 13 – A Jewish vocal group of preadolescent youth whose material proved an inexplicable hit on social media over the last month turned down an ...
Read More »IDF Demolitions Of Terrorists’ Homes: Islamophobic Suppression Of Palestinian Throwing-Gays-Off-Roofs Ritual
“Palestinians could not perform the roof-throwing of a gay man properly, and had no choice but to kidnap the Palestinian man from inside Israel, drag him back to Palestinian-controlled territory, and behead him.” Ramallah, October 9 – Human rights groups and ...
Read More »Man Who Won’t Hire Visibly-Religious Jews Blames Them For Not Working
“Parasites,” Corell was heard to mutter after rereading a New York Times article on the alleged academic underperformance of certain Hasidic schools. New York, September 29 – A business owner with a bias against employing Haredim also accuses Haredim of ...
Read More »Quick, Find A New Alarmist Buzzword To Call Israel – ‘Apartheid’ Isn’t Working
by Linda Sarsour New York, September 19 – I just returned from a solidarity visit to our Palestinian brethren under occupation, and I have both good news and bad news. The good news: our brothers and sisters facing the brutal colonialist ...
Read More »Only Possible Conclusion From Unpopularity Of Party’s Ideas: Voters Stupid
“Essentially, the people are wrong for thinking Palestinians trying to kill us means we shouldn’t give Palestinians greater capacity to kill us,” explained Chairwoman Zahava Gal-On. Tel Aviv, September 15 – A political faction struggling to approach, let alone restore, ...
Read More »All Culture To Be Transformed Into Amorphous Blobs To Avoid Offending, Triggering
Even the braille edition of The New York Times will come to an end by mid-2023, since the use of braille requires literacy, and that discriminate against the literacy-impaired. New York, September 4 – Museums, schools, libraries, and other repositories of ...
Read More »Rest Of Mideast Kind Of Jealous Ben-Gvir Wants To Send Only Palestinians To Europe
“It just isn’t fair.” Amman, August 25 – A controversial, discriminatory proposal by a far-right Israeli lawmaker piqued interest in the wider region this week, and caused many to wonder why only disloyal Arabs living under Israeli rule would get ...
Read More »Amusement Park Manager Admits She Overbooked Group Visits Just To Ruin Your Family’s Trip
“Frustration for a family that has to wade through throngs of misbehaving day-campers just to miss a shot at a bad stuffed imitation of a popular animated character… that’s what it’s all about.” Tel Aviv, August 18 – The director ...
Read More »Occupation Forces Palestinian Official To Divert Precious Water To His 4 Pools
“It’s a longtime problem,” agreed Abbig Hattub, assistant manager of a Jericho-area water park that has never cut back on its water use. Jericho, August 16 – A high-ranking functionary of Mahmoud Abbas’s government blamed Israel for exacerbating the shortage of ...
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