Not a single original idea since like 2012. Tel Aviv, December 17 – Observers expecting something original out of the ongoing Israeli political morass voiced their disapproval this week over yet another predictable twist in the narrative, noting that talk of ...
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Feed SubscriptionHanukkah Light Sends Paul Revere On False-Alarm Ride
“Oops,” he muttered. “Awkward.” Boston, December 10 – A Massachusetts silversmith admitted chagrin today following an incident last night in which he misinterpreted a Jewish festival ritual as a signal that he must warn fellow patriots of the route, destination, ...
Read More »Stop Misinterpreting The ‘From The River To The Sea’ Call For Genocide As A Call For Genocide
by Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) Washington, December 3 – A few days ago I felt compelled to remove a message I reposted from elsewhere on Twitter, a message that contained the oft-repeated slogan of Palestinian national liberation, “From the River ...
Read More »Twitter Fails To Apply ‘Disputed’ Label To Mother-In-Law’s ‘World’s Best Brownies’ Claim
“I even offered to send Jack Dorsey samples to prove it, but nothing.” Bat-Yam, November 26 – Sources close to the father of a local family reported today that he has yet to receive an explanation from the social media ...
Read More »Scholar Posits Textual Anomalies In Bible The Result Of Autocorrect
Upwards of 95% of these occurrences can be thus explained. Cambridge, November 19 – An innovative approach to analysis of ancient documents has led at least one researcher to the hypothesis that numerous deviations in Scripture from the expected forms of ...
Read More »If Reinstated, Corbyn Vows To Minimize Carbon Footprint On Way To Lay Wreaths At Terrorist Graves
“I have had, in my zeal for universal human equality, some blind spots.” London, November 12 – Ousted UK Labour Chairman Jeremy Corbyn continued to argue today in favor of revoking his expulsion from the party following an inquest finding ...
Read More »Despite Industry’s Failures In 2016, 2020, Abbas Trusts Polls Showing He Better Not Call Elections Ever
“The will of the people is dangerous to our careers.” Ramallah, November 5 – The President of the Palestinian Authority believes public opinion surveys showing the deep unpopularity of him personally and of his governing faction among Palestinians, even though ...
Read More »Commission: Israel Not Truly Jewish State Without 2nd Knesset MKs Don’t Attend
“I might also point out that certain government-run institutions have an unfortunate reputation for punctuality.” Jerusalem, October 29 – A governmental fact-finding committee on the relationship between state and religion published its findings today following two years of research into ...
Read More »Socially-Distanced Riots Hamper Terrorists Trying To Hide Among Civilians
Palestinian restrictions on conduct in the public space makes it difficult for significant numbers of violent demonstrators to use women and children as human shields. Nebi Saleh, October 22 – Palestinian stone- and firebomb-throwers confronting Israeli troops in and near ...
Read More »‘BDS’ Much Shorter Than ‘Movement To Make Jews Feel Unsafe Anywhere’
“Our real accomplishment isn’t in metrics of celebrity visits canceled, but creating an environment across the US and Europe where Jews feel threatened.” Berkeley, October 15 – Activists campaigning for the economic, diplomatic, and cultural isolation of the world’s only ...
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