PreOccupied Territory The News In Advance. Barely.

“I hear that’s been happening a lot lately. Climate change or something. I don’t claim to be an expert.” Ra’anana, January 11 – Taking his cue from apologists for Palestinian terrorists, a junior in the local high school has taken ...

“My friends’ first reaction was to ask about the bachelor party.” Hod HaSharon, December 30 – A woman and her fiancé acknowledged this afternoon that while the two of them much prefer an intimate, wholesome celebration to accompany their upcoming ...

“Please respect our daughter’s privacy at this difficult time.” Jerusalem, December 22 – Relatives and friends gathered today to console a local ninth-grader who underwent the catastrophic experience today of having to transfer accumulated kitchen garbage from its receptacle in ...

“I took that as a heavenly sign endorsing my efforts to date, especially my efforts to find more donuts.” Jerusalem, December 13 – A resident who resolved to abstain from the deep-fried dough treats associated with the Jewish “Festival of ...

“I can’t believe the insensitivity of these [parking enforcement] people. They have such chutzpah.” Jerusalem, December 2 – A driver who wrote an explanatory message for municipal enforcers, noting that he placed his vehicle in a zone where only local ...

“Poor Sarah has to have impossible documentation, but those Bedouin get to live and build whatever they want, wherever they want?” Jerusalem, November 23 – A self-proclaimed heir to a property in the center of Israel’s capital city voiced her ...

Experts have known for years that monkeys pick stocks as well as experienced analysts. Tel Aviv, November 14 – Securities brokerages and bourse research companies in Israel’s financial and commercial capital began to implement new recruitment procedures today, in reaction ...

Horror upon discovering that the child failed to uphold the hamster’s gender identity, and sought to impose cisgender heterodominant hegemony. Hertzliya, November 3 – Controversy has shaken this middle-class suburb north of Tel Aviv since late last week when a school ...

The couple, who only became parents after moving to Israel, never exercised such discriminatory discipline toward their children when they still lived in Ethiopia. Mevasseret Tziyon, October 25 – Civil rights and social equality organizations condemned a local couple today ...

Anecdotal evidence suggests previous cases have occurred. Jerusalem, October 14 – A social network aimed at facilitating and tightening connections among career-minded professionals sent one of its members an e-mail alert today, informing her that someone, somewhere, had queried the ...