"Gaza still hasn't run out of food despite having only two days' worth of food for, what, seven months?"
Read More »Lack Of Starvation In Gaza Undermining Mom’s ‘Eat Up, Children Are Starving In Gaza!’ Admonition
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Man Vows To Take Moment From Yom HaAtzmaut BBQ To Feel Bad For Hostages
"Brothers and sisters who have nothing to celebrate. Rutti, make sure the portable soccer goalposts are packed."
Read More »Report: Leftover Donut From Hanukkah Probably Still Edible
"All the sugar should keep it from spoiling."
Read More »Teen’s Room Proves Rich Archaeological Trove During Passover Cleaning
"The last time he changed his bedsheets? Probably sometime during the Mameluk era."
Read More »Ants Undeterred By Oven-Cleaner Rampage
Spring has brought an entirely new clutch of ants that failed to learn the lesson he had aimed to impart to their predecessors.
Read More »ADHD Management Available Via Processes ADHD Sufferers Cannot Complete
ADHD symptoms typically make it inordinately difficult to begin, let alone complete, even simple tasks if the process is daunting enough.
Read More »Weather Not Quite Warm Enough For Captured-Terrorists-Handcuffed-In-Underwear Group Purim Costume
Comments about the zaftig body types in the friend group led to the epiphany.
Read More »Late-Winter Mosquito Obviously A Mossad Mini-Drone
"I'm glad we have the advantage of conditioning in our youth and adulthood to view all negative phenomena as the work of the Zionists."
Read More »Kids Perform Daring Rescue Of Hostage Snacks From Dad’s Closet
The raid began with a discreet scouting mission at around 10 pm.
Read More »13 Herzl St., Haifa, Building Association Adopts Resolution Calling For Chicago Gang Ceasefire
"Certainly they're as credible, if not more credible, than the United Nations General Assembly."
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