“With Woke Tours, there is no need to sacrifice the world-famous cuisine, culture and beaches of Tel Aviv – a center of LGBTQ life – just because one wants to make a political statement.” Tel Aviv, April 3 – A ...
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Feed SubscriptionEgged Driver Embarks On Mission To Eliminate Following Distance
The driver moved to close the gap as quickly as possible, lest, one must assume, a surfeit of air wreak untold havoc on everything in the vicinity. Jerusalem, March 30 – The operator of a local bus covering the Givat ...
Read More »Goebbels Doesn’t Know Whether To Be Flattered Or Repulsed By Haaretz Column Offer
Publisher Amos Schocken made the offer in person, according to Haaretz. Berlin, March 26 – Nazi propaganda chief Josef Goebbels voiced conflicting emotions today over an invitation from the Israeli newspaper Haaretz to write a weekly op-ed article for them. The ...
Read More »Leaders Call Efforts To Reduce Fatal Crashes In Arab Sector ‘Cultural Imperialism’
NGOs also characterized the programs as impinging on the community’s identity as victim by implying that Arabs might possess volition, a notion that strikes at the very heart of modern Arab identity. Tayibe, March 22 – Prominent figures in Israel’s Arab ...
Read More »Study: Vaccines Implicated In Not Dying From Horrible, Preventable Diseases
Because of the widespread use of vaccines, most children will never know what it’s like to die from diphtheria. Jerusalem, March 17 – Researchers at Hadassah University Hospital have published the shocking results of a study they conducted that links ...
Read More »Proctologists Find Heads Of Remaining Two-State Solution Advocates
“The ears are located in the head, and the location of that cranium within the anus would effectively block the patient from hearing the dehumanization and delegitimization of Jewish sovereignty so prevalent in Palestinian media.” Haifa, March 13 – Diagnosticians ...
Read More »New Regulations Mandate Horns As Loud On Inside Of Car As Outside
Automotive repair and installation establishments have been issued guidelines for calibrating existing horn systems to adapt them to the new requirements. Tel Aviv, March 8 – Automotive regulations scheduled to go into effect on the first of April will require ...
Read More »Smashed Mt. Of Olives Tombstones Getting In Way Of Haaretz Dancing On Graves
“We remain very strict about confining harm to people who are religious Jews, the political right, IDF soldiers, police, and any positive sense of Jewishness. But we draw the line at letting our people come to harm.” Jerusalem, March 1 ...
Read More »Census Puts Jerusalem At 870,000 People, 1,000,000 Hair Salons
Hair salon growth has spiked in the last twenty years, overtaking the population at around the turn of the millennium. Jerusalem, February 27 – Israel’s Central Bureau of Statistics released new data on the population of the country’s capital and ...
Read More »Criminals Threaten To Go On Strike If Demands Not Met
Experts cast doubt on the strike’s potential impact. Natanya, February 23 – Representatives of crime syndicates and individual criminals announced today that if the State does not meet their demands for better working conditions, they will refuse to commit the ...
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