Some have bought packages of Israeli candy without comment, but several did specifically ask whether there was any of local provenance. Dayariyya, West Bank, June 9 – Residents of this isolated town north of Nablus confessed they felt awkward last ...
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Feed SubscriptionHaaretz To Charge Users To Submit Non-Left-Wing Comments
“Providing quality journalism is not cheap, and what Haaretz does costs money, too.” Tel Aviv, June 6 – To maintain the ideological consistency of its online platform and to boost its struggling bottom line, the Haaretz newspaper’s web site will ...
Read More »Haredim Seek to Censor Rainbow from Noah Story; ‘Gay Symbol’
“We know how dangerous images can be, and we’re not going to allow the Gay Agenda to dictate people’s understanding of Holy Writ.” Bnei Brak, June 1 – In anticipation of the annual Tel Aviv Gay Pride parade, a coalition of ...
Read More »Ministry Of Health Warns Don’t Be That Guy
Hundreds are injured annually as a result of people being That Guy. Jerusalem, May 28 – Increasing public health dangers have prompted the Ministry of Health to issue a warning to individual Israelis not to be That Guy, a ministry ...
Read More »To Confuse BDS, Israeli Promoters Advertising Made-Up Acts
Bimot is currently laying the groundwork for a supposed performance in Israel by a nonexistent man named Elton John. Tel Aviv, May 22 – Israeli concert promoters sent former Pink Floyd front man and current promoter of an artistic boycott ...
Read More »Ancient Israelites Unaware The Place Supposed To Be Called ‘Palestine’
“Obviously, the Zionists got to these ancient peoples before we did.” Samaria, May 18 – The inhabitants of this ten-tribe kingdom north of Jerusalem, along with their brethren in the kingdom Judah to the south, are oblivious to the fact ...
Read More »Israelis To Honor Nature By Bickering In Lusher Setting
Ein Gedi Nature Reserve, May 12 – Israelis by the tens of thousands thousands took advantage of the Independence Day holiday to break from routine and argue in greener, more bucolic areas of the country for a change. Schools are closed and most ...
Read More »Amazon Moves Peres’s “The New Middle East” To Fantasy Section
Some committee members wanted to relegate The New Middle East to the humor section. Seattle, May 8 – Internet commerce giant Amazon.com has reclassified a non-fiction work by former Israeli President Shimon Peres about Mideast peace, instead categorizing it as ...
Read More »Bob The Builder Named In Settlement Construction Probe
The allegations may adversely affect the new animated series of Mr. the Builder’s chronicles. Tel Aviv, May 3 – Anti-settlement activists are accusing a prominent international entertainer of actively working on homes for Israeli Jews in areas Palestinians claim for ...
Read More »Rabbi Elazar Ben Azaria Still Hasn’t Updated JDate Profile Pic
“Give the guy a break – he hasn’t updated Twitter at all, and forget about Instagram.” Yavne, April 26 – The newly installed head of the Sanhedrin has yet to upload a more accurate, up-to-date photo for his profile on ...
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