Now they cannot even at least fifteen times per day, up from an average of only nine times per day before the current wave of attacks began nearly two months ago. Ra’anana, November 11 – A report by the Ministry ...
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Feed SubscriptionBen & Jerry’s Israel Nixes ‘Palestinian Organ Harvest’ Flavor
The manufacturer has been unable to secure Palestinian organs or tissues that could be considered FairTrade. B’er Tuvia Industrial Zone, November 6 – The importers and manufacturers of Ben and Jerry’s premium ice cream in Israel put the kibosh on ...
Read More »Police Cruelly Deny Journalists Opportunity To Report Lynch By Jews
“To my great dismay, the police undermined my ability to provide our audience with a visceral confirmation of my biases.” Rishon LeTzion, November 2 – Law enforcement personnel in this Tel Aviv suburb displayed what journalists are describing as intense ...
Read More »Roger Waters Livid At Israeli Reverence For Wall
“I’m going to put a stop to this nonsense. Even if it takes two thousand years.” New York, October 28 – A leading figure in the movement to impose a cultural boycott on Israel expressed shock and anger today that ...
Read More »Tel Aviv To Build Wall To Keep Out Separation Barrier Advocates
“We will shield ourselves from the mentality that walling ourselves off from trouble somehow solves the problem.” Tel Aviv, October 22 – Perturbed that many people who accept separation barriers as a valid approach to address problems enter Tel Aviv ...
Read More »To Go With Palestinian Child Livers, Bistro Offers Fava Beans, Chianti
Hannibal introduced delicacies such as Tongue à la Nurse, acting with such casualness that her pulse likely never got above 85 in the process. Tel Aviv, October 18 – At Lecter, an upscale restaurant in downtown Tel Aviv, the wine list ...
Read More »Batman To Visit Israel To Learn Combat With Umbrellas, Selfie Sticks
Experts say acquiring combat skills with an umbrella, in particular, would constitute a poetic achievement of sorts for Batman, one of whose arch-nemeses is the umbrella-wielding Penguin. Gotham City, October 14 – The vigilante crime fighter of this troubled municipality ...
Read More »E. Jerusalem Cutco Salesman Can’t Believe His Good Timing
“I’m not surprised the Tel Aviv attack resulted in only light injuries to the four victims. That’s basically what you get when you settle for an inferior product.” Jerusalem, October 8 – Jamal Masri, 21, is effusive in describing his ...
Read More »Cumin Rights Watch Says Israel Treating Activists As Spice
Israel has mustard significant personnel for this purpose. Basil, Switzerland, October 8 – Executive Director of Cumin Rights Watch Fennel Roth told reporters today that Israel is treating his oreganozation’s personnel as spice, and illegally restricting their movemint. Roth called a ...
Read More »Ancient Mosaic Reveals Byzantines Were Made Of Tile, Mortar
“Why did they disappear as suddenly as they appeared in history? These are all tantalizing, mystifying issues.” Kiryat Malachi, September 30 – Archaeologists studying a newly discovered mosaic in this southern town expressed satisfaction at the level of detail preserved ...
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