The recent episodes strengthened the assessment among Israelis that the $#!t has seriously hit the goddamn fan. Jerusalem, July 31 – In the day following a stabbing attack on the Jerusalem Gay Pride Parade and a fatal arson attack on ...
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Feed SubscriptionIsraelis Who Still See Abbas As Credible Peace Partner Gather In Kiosk
“We managed to achieve a ratio of European journalists to participants of exactly three to one, if you count the proprietor of the place.” Tel Aviv, July 27 – A coalition of peace activists who still believe Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas ...
Read More »Israelis Puzzled That EU Thinks Anyone Can Get A Mortgage These Days
Israelis voiced confusion today after the recommendation was reported, as no one seems to be able to secure a mortgage anyway, or knows anyone who has. Jerusalem, July 22 – A European think tank recommended that the European Union adopt ...
Read More »Israeli Startup Creates Popular BDS-Coordinating Apps
“By selling our product and follow-on support to BDS movement coordinators from here in Israel, we recouped the initial investment capital within six months of going to market.” Herzliya Pituach, July 17 – Amid the dense concentration of high-tech companies ...
Read More »Rapper 50 Cent Promoted In Israel As 1.89 Shekel
“We always go the extra 1.60934 kilometers for our entertainment partners.” Tel Aviv, July 13 – An Israeli entertainment marketing contractor is facing confusion from fans and anger from its overseas client after converting rap artist 50 Cent’s name into the ...
Read More »Ynet Introduces Maximum IQ For Comment Submissions
“Our brand carries a certain set of associations, and an erudite readership is not something we see ourselves as having,” said the site’s managing editor, Daili Mell. Tel Aviv, July 8 – Israel’s largest provider of online news and analysis announced ...
Read More »Israel Suppressing Islamic Culture By Reducing Honor Killings
The conference called on international bodies such as UNESCO to protect the cherished practice from Israeli “cultural genocide.” Jerusalem, July 2 – Islamic scholars and leaders gathered in the Jordanian capital city of Amman to denounce Israel for suppressing the ancient ...
Read More »Archaeologists Unearth Oldest ‘Shimon Peres Is So Old’ Joke
The new discovery pushes back the currency of the trope a further four hundred years, making it almost as old as Peres. Mareisha, Israel, June 24 – Researchers excavating a site from the period of the Biblical King David have discovered ...
Read More »Somebody Apparently Buying, Eating Krembos
“I’m sure there are plenty of uses for Krembo that don’t involve putting it inside your body.” Ramat Gan, June 18 – Food retailers across the country report that despite the manifestly non-edible nature of the Krembo snack, somebody is ...
Read More »Candy To Celebrate Palestinian Deaths Inexplicably Selling Badly
He assumed, based on media coverage of right-wing Jews, that the latter would respond with open pocketbooks. Jerusalem, June 11 – An entrepreneur who hoped to be the first to open an untapped market in Israel admitted error in gauging ...
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