Israelis will continue to be subjected to fans pathetically referring to their favorite team as “we.” Tel Aviv, June 4 – Palestinian withdrawal last week of a FIFA resolution to expel Israel from membership in the international organization means Israelis will ...
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Feed SubscriptionHamas Members Complain About Not Meeting OneRepublic
“One selfie with us wouldn’t hurt, would it?” Gaza City, May 29 – In the wake of a picture showing popular band OneRepublic visiting IDF soldiers manning an Iron Dome battery, Hamas militants have complained about being denied a visit by the ...
Read More »Hamas Songwriter Scores Gig As Bar Mitzva DJ
“I might just bomb,” he said. “But that I’m used to.” Shuja’iyya, Gaza Strip, May 27 – Fredj Al-Julsun, 27, never knew just a year ago that his foray into composing propaganda songs for the Islamist group Hamas would lead ...
Read More »Siblings Accuse Teen Who Cleans Room Of ‘Normalization’
“Any contention that the parental entities somehow have a claim to this territory is simply a falsification of history and serves to legitimize the occupation.” Raanana, May 19 – A local high-schooler has been ostracized by her brother and sister for ...
Read More »Study: You Should Put A Hat On That Child
The study looked at the reactions of 30 women to the way you had chosen to attire your child for the 300-meter trip. Jerusalem, May 11 – A survey of fellow pedestrians and other individuals whom you passed with your baby ...
Read More »Protest Dispersal Station Now Fully Armed, Operational
Not everyone is thrilled with the deployment of the new device, specifically because of its capacity to stifle democratic protests. Jerusalem, May the 4th – Amid a wave of protests against police brutality and discrimination against citizens of Ethiopian origin, ...
Read More »Israel Copyrights Mention Of Islamophobia, Putting Haters In Bind
Editor’s note: Israel Military Industries gave its consent to the use of the term “Islamophobia” in this article. Tel Aviv, April 27 – A government-owned Israeli corporation secured rights to use of the term “Islamophobia” this week, putting it in ...
Read More »Despite Low Education, Haredim Excelling At Multiplying
The report also recommended further study of the news media, which, although largely composed of Liberal Arts majors, demonstrates an ability to divide that heretofore has been considered the exclusive province of mathematical experts. Bnei Brak, April 20 – Dismal ...
Read More »Kim/Kanye Visit Makes Wall Actually Wail
The media hullabaloo surrounding the impending arrival at the Wailing Wall of the mega-star couple drove home to the sacred Temple remnant just how far humanity has sunk. Jerusalem, April 13 – One of the last remnants of King Herod’s ...
Read More »Market Report: Chametz Futures Down
Bread, pizza, and cookie futures began falling late last week, followed more modestly by cakes, pies, crackers and pretzels. Tel Aviv, April 2 – Commodities traders in Israel have noticed a recent decrease in the price of futures for potentially leavened ...
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