By Isaac Herzog, Labor Party Chairman Last year and this year brought more than their share of electoral surprises. In each case, the left-leaning media lulled us leftists into complacency by predicting a weakening of the Right, if not our ...
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Feed SubscriptionEU Mandates Grade-School Courses On How To Be Dhimmis
“This commission agreed unanimously that training our young people to embrace this future is the wisest course of action.” Brussels, November 2 – A special commission of the European Parliament submitted its binding recommendations to the legislature today on the ...
Read More »Kurds Mulling Rebranding As ‘Palestine’ To Gain International Recognition
A recent Pew poll found that 67% of Kurds agreed with the statement that “being whiny and nagging about Jews will get you recognition faster than historical, moral, or ethnic reasons.” The Kurdistan Regional Government, along with the main Kurdish ...
Read More »I’m Pretty Sure My Vision Didn’t Involve Funeral Traffic Snarls
By Shimon Peres Oh look, I’m dead now. That’s a relief. Yes, it’s sad and disappointing, but the time comes for everyone, and I’ve had more time than most. Media attention has already turned to pretentious discussion of my legacy ...
Read More »UN Demands Israelites Supply Anti-Arrow Defenses To Philistines
“These Israelites claim to represent the ideals of the Living God, but I don’t see them doing the ethically proper thing and giving us the tools to repel their counteroffensives,” argued Akhish, potentate of this city-state. Gath, September 21 – ...
Read More »Barak Comeback: Bibi’s Plan To Destroy Left Once And For All
“He’ll lead the party and the entire Left into oblivion for years to come.” Tel Aviv, September 15 – Political analysts are hailing Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu’s latest machinations to weaken the opposition, specifically his engineering of former Prime Minister Ehud ...
Read More »Report: Biblical Deluge Caused By Zionists Opening Dams
Among other evidence, Dr. Tzidibba pointed to the notion of collective punishment that informs both stories, and the fraught relationship the survivors tended to have with alcoholic beverages. Mt. Ararat, September 7 – A new investigation into the flood that ...
Read More »No One Clamoring For Removal Of ISIS’s Google+ Pages
To do so would require that users encounter those pages, which in turn requires that such users exist. Mountain View, CA, August 31 – Executives at Google have noted that whereas controversy has erupted for years over the use of ...
Read More »Jerusalem Divided Over Goy Pride Parade
Community leaders among the ultra-orthodox have been engaged to prevent violence. Jerusalem, August 24 – An application by a group of non-Jews to march through the capital city of the Jewish State in a demonstration of political and cultural defiance ...
Read More »Obama To Unveil Kenyan Birth Certificate Day After Leaving Office
“He’s been sitting on this thing forever,” said one staffer. Washington, August 18 – Sources close to US President Barack Obama reported today that immediately after returning to private life, the president intends to finally lay to rest questions of his ...
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