“We will supply you with whatever you need until there are no more left of you to supply.” Tehran, November 14 – Leaders of the Islamic Republic asserted again their commitment to combating the existence of the Jewish State until ...
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Feed SubscriptionIran Defends Imperialism As Bulwark Against Imperialism
“The Zionists and their allies will fail in their campaign to subjugate and rule the region because we will do so first.” Tehran, November 6 – Officials in the Islamic Republic of Iran explain the country’s virtual takeover of Iraq ...
Read More »Turkey Insists Made Al-Baghdadi Op Possible, No Armenian Genocide, Erdogan Not Gay
Turkish sources failed to provide concrete evidence of any of the subject assertions. Ankara, October 28 – A day after an audacious American strike may have killed the leader of the notorious Islamic State terrorist group in northeastern Syria, Turkish officials clamored ...
Read More »Pakistan Wondering How Much Longer It Can Keep Citizen Anger Focused On Faraway Israel
“An emerging challenge for the leadership in deflecting attention from its cronyism, nepotism, incompetence, corruption, support for terrorists, warped domestic priorities, and other issues best left shrouded in distraction.” Islamabad, October 3 – A proven political strategy to divert popular resentment from the ...
Read More »Iran Hopes Its Continued Terrorism Empowers American Moderates
“We know this strategy worked during the Obama administration.” Tehran, September 19 – Regime officials in the Islamic Republic expressed desire this week that their ongoing efforts to sow instability, political violence, ethnic cleansing, and attain regional hegemony will encourage ...
Read More »Inspection Of IAEA Facility Finds Traces Of Competence
Representatives of the agency declined to comment. Vienna, September 10 – A recent exploration of the International Atomic Energy Agency’s various offices and laboratories has turned up evidence that the organization possesses the capacity to conduct effective monitoring of Iran’s ...
Read More »Lebanese Baffled Why Israel So Bad At Apartheid Vs Palestinians When Lebanon Right There Showing Them How
“Officially, as you know, this is for their own sake, which is why we also build high walls around their camps, we love them so much.” Beirut, August 29 – Residents of Israel’s tiny northern neighbor voiced puzzlement today regarding ...
Read More »With Jews Sovereign And Prospering, Mideast Arabs Struggle To Find People To Look Down On
The traditional paradigm cannot account for a not-under-anyone’s-boot Jew. Petra, Jordan, August 21 – Generations of Muslim Arabs throughout the region long knew that no matter how low they sank on the social, economic, or political totem pole, at least ...
Read More »Iran Threatens To Use Cheat Codes In Simulation Of Conflict With US Navy
“Our arsenal of such secret keystroke sequences includes unlimited firepower, impenetrable armor, and, while this might not have clear application at sea, the ability to walk through walls.” Dahran, Saudi Arabia, August 12 – Tensions between the Islamic Republic and ...
Read More »Arab Govt’s Cite Backwardness, Incompetence As Proof Jews Don’t Control Them
“You’ll notice Jewish control always goes hand-in-hand with a more or less functioning, accountable government.” Amman, August 1 – Rulers throughout the Middle East sought this week to assuage concerns that they serve as mere puppets in a vast Jewish ...
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