“Turkey’s involvement in genocide – the first genocide of the twentieth century, it should be noted – was directed not at Jews, unfortunately, but at Armenians.” Brussels, November 29 – Officials in the European Customs Union shared concerns today that ...
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Feed SubscriptionUS Urged To Shift From Alliance With Repressive Monarchy To Alliance With Repressive Theocracy
“The mullahs of Tehran export an entirely different type of ideology that has led to entirely different worldwide terrorism and instability.” Washington, November 20 – Diplomats, politicians, and activists have seized upon last month’s grisly kidnap and murder of a ...
Read More »Report: Furbies, Bell-Bottoms Now More Relevant Than Palestinians
Already in 2001, Rainbow Brite and Pet Rocks were viewed as more pertinent to world affairs. Vienna, November 7 – A new assessment of emerging global trends has found that the Palestinian national cause now ranks as less pertinent and ...
Read More »Arabs Fear Warming Ties With Israel Will Cause Democracy, Freedoms
“Democracy is a nice word, but it’s a foreign idea that should never have been introduced into the region.” Abu Dhabi, October 31 – A high-profile visit by the Jewish State’s Minister of Culture this week to this Arabian Gulf ...
Read More »Saudi Reassures Progressives No GMOs Used In Eliminating Khashoggi
“No criticism seems to emerge from the same quarters regarding Turkey’s or Iran’s use of GMO foods.” Riyadh, October 22 – Officials of King Salman’s royal family sought to assuage ongoing leftist anger at the kingdom over its admitted role ...
Read More »Typo Results In Palestinian Preacher Inciting Violence Against Jaws
“I get that’s it’s a bad movie. Is it because of the ethnicity of the film’s director? That wasn’t made clear, in my opinion.” Ramallah, October 9 – Materials distributed to mosque officials by the Palestinian government today contained a ...
Read More »Palestinians Adopt Israeli Plan To Make World Sick Of Palestinians
Materials distributed by the office of the president provided details of the dovetailing strategies. Ramallah, September 5 – Leaders of the Palestinian national movement gave formal approval today to a long-time Israeli strategy aimed at causing the international community to ...
Read More »Octopuses Depict Enemies As Antisemites
“We might be witness to an adaptive behavior developing in real time, and that’s always of interest.” Arabian Gulf, August 1 – Cephalopods aiming to strike a visceral chord among the public in fomenting animosity and suspicion against political or ...
Read More »Judean Intelligence Absconds With Cartloads Of Parthian Archery Program Cuneiform Tablets
Judean agents deployed in the Parthian capital had identified an old grain silo on the outskirts of the city as the storage facility housing the secret trove. Jerusalem, July 19 – The administration of Queen Salome scored an intelligence and ...
Read More »Banks Pulling Out Of Iran Relieved To Still Be Able To Sponsor Antisemites At Home
Firms find a silver lining in being able to identify and support causes through sponsorship of events and groups in Britain such as Roger Waters, War on Want, and others with unassailable antisemitic bona fides. London, July 12 – Financial ...
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