“Without multiple impressive homes, what is the point of a leadership position?” Ramallah, August 26 – As unemployment soars and Gaza reconstruction has yet to get in gear, Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas made another impassioned plea to Arab nations today ...
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Feed SubscriptionCarter To Seek Cancer Treatment In Gaza: ‘No Jewish MDs There’
“Mr. Carter’s good friend is a Norwegian physician who has spent quite a bit of time in Gaza, and assured him that the place is teeming with radioactive fragments from Israel’s profligate use of depleted uranium artillery.” Plains, Georgia, August ...
Read More »UN GoFundMe Syria Death Toll Campaign Almost At 300K Goal
“We’re almost at the point where the Council will have enough motivation to take some action, and that’s quite accomplishment.” Geneva, August 16 – The United Nations Human Rights Council is not ignoring the bloody Syrian conflict, says a representative, ...
Read More »When Syria’s Jews All Gone, Persecution Of Them To End
There will be no Jewish residents of either country barred from holding public office, serving in the army, or wielding authority over non-Jews. Damascus, August 12 – Syria is poised to become a country in which no persecution of Jews ...
Read More »Tinder App For Muslim Countries Lets Only Men Swipe Left
A second important adaptation for Muslim countries involves the elimination of profile photos that display any more than a woman’s eyes. New York, August 4 – A new version of the matchmaking app Tinder for Muslim countries has adapted the ...
Read More »Riyadh Ballet Stymied By Burkha Requirement
Ballet officials are considering indefinite postponement, unless the lack of seasoned, willing talent can be addressed soon. Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, July 29 – Attempts to promote Saudi Arabia and its capital as a forward-looking, culture-rich destination have hit a snag ...
Read More »Iran Insists Inspectors Get No Access To Ayatollah’s Porn Collection
“The Tera Patrick, Stoya, and Jayden Jaymes video collections, especially, will never be made available to outside eyes.” Tehran, July 28 – Officials in Iran’s Ministry of Foreign Affairs sought to quell reports today that international inspectors would be able ...
Read More »Millions Of Radical Islamists Still Unaware They Are Not Following Islam
“It has taken liberal academics centuries to realize that the only authentic expression of any value system is one that dovetails with liberal academics’ axioms.” Raqqa, Islamic State (formerly Syria), July 22 – As the Islamic State establishes itself in ...
Read More »Amid Yemen Strife, UNHRC To Hold Urgent Cocktail Party
“Even if it takes associating with some of the most notorious names in entertainment, we know we just have to do our jobs.” Geneva, July 15 – More than 1600 civilians have been killed in the ongoing Saudi-led offensive against ...
Read More »Vienna Brothels Demand Another Iran Talks Extension
They expressed regret that the US team had only brought a small contingent of Secret Service personnel. Vienna, July 8 – A spokesman for the Austrian capital’s prostitution industry today petitioned the parties involved in negotiations over Iran’s nuclear program ...
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