Gaza City, November 24 – The Palestinian government today ordered Palestinians to cease distributing sweets when terrorists kill Jews, saying that the practice puts Gaza’s population at greater risk for developing diabetes. The Ministry of Health released new guidelines today following the ...
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Feed SubscriptionCoveted Refugee Status Bequeathed To Children
Yarmouk Refugee Camp, Syria, November 16 – A resident of this embattled neighborhood of Damascus died at the hands of an insurgent sniper this morning, leaving his four children the envy of millions of other refugees worldwide. Whereas the refugees ...
Read More »Palestinians Blast Appearance Of Israel In Google Search Results
Ramallah, November 11 – Palestinian Negotiator Saeb Erekat lambasted Google today, criticizing the internet giant for promoting “normalization” with Israel by allowing the country’s name to appear in search results. Erekat held a press conference at the Muqata, where he ...
Read More »Amnesty International To Merge With Hamas
“It’s a natural synergy of goals and talents,” said an AI spokesman. Gaza City, November 5 – One of the world’s most prominent organizations working to raise awareness of human rights violations and political repression will officially join forces with ...
Read More »Holocaust Denier Denies Not Denying Holocaust
Tehran, October 23 – A senior Iranian official today denied reports that he had failed to deny the Holocaust, attempting to fend off criticism from political rivals intent on denying him support. Maher Shalalhashbaz, a regional governor, told reporters he ...
Read More »Iran On Texas Execution Rate: ‘Bloody Amateurs’
“Wannabe Texas can’t even manage one per week. That would be comical if it weren’t so downright lame.” Tehran, October 16 – Officials in Iran expressed disdain for the supposed cruelty of Texas’s criminal justice system today, calling the Lone ...
Read More »US Incentives Prompt ISIS To Join Coalition Against ISIS
Baghdad, October 11 – The political and economic benefits promised to potential members of the coalition to combat the Islamic State has led the organization itself to join, diplomats in the Middle East reported Saturday. US Secretary of State John ...
Read More »Report: This Beheading Thing Getting Old
London, October 4 – The latest instance of the Islamic State’s use of beheading to intimidate the West serves as evidence that the technique no longer carries the novelty it once did, news outlets reported this weekend, and in fact ...
Read More »After Bridging NY-Boston Rivalry, Jeter To Mediate Mideast Conflict
Boston, September 29 – Following an outpouring of appreciation once deemed impossible from fans of a hated rival, the outgoing shortstop of the New York Yankees has been appointed Special Envoy to the Middle East. He will use his powers ...
Read More »Sponsor Of Terrorism Welcomes Efforts To Fight Terrorism
Damascus, Syria, September 23 – The leader of a state deeply enmeshed in the support and arming of groups violently targeting civilian populations as a means of achieving political aims told visiting dignitaries today that he backs US-led efforts to ...
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