Jerusalem, January 16 – Information leaked from Israeli cabinet intelligence briefings suggests that Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu has engaged a Sicilian mercenary to foment a war between the United States and Iran. Long dismissive of American and other international efforts ...
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Feed SubscriptionRace To Politicize Pope’s Mideast Visit Begins
Jerusalem (AP) – Pope Francis announced yesterday that he would be visiting the Holy Land in May of this year, setting off a scramble among Israelis and Palestinians to score propaganda points in their ongoing conflict and to leverage the ...
Read More »Tragedy Strikes As Gaza Strip Fails To Sink Into Mediterranean
As a consequence, the area continues to suffer from appalling mismanagement, incitement to violence, soaring unemployment, inadequate sewage, and increased radicalization. Gaza City, Gaza Strip, January 5 – The Gaza Strip was not struck by a massive earthquake that separated ...
Read More »World Pulls Jaw Muscle While Yawning At Beirut Bombing
New York (AP) – The world was treated for a pulled jaw muscle today after yawning at the car bombing in a Beirut suburb yesterday. Doctors at New York’s Bellevue Hospital reported that that patient was admitted to the ER, ...
Read More »Media Outlets Rush To Update Pending Sharon Obituaries
New York (AP) – A rapid deterioration of former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon’s condition has journalists scrambling to update their files in case the publication of an obituary becomes necessary in the coming hours or days. Sharon, 85, suffered ...
Read More »Israeli Gov’t Regrets Hanging Eichmann; ‘Could Have Freed Him Today’
Jerusalem (AP) – A spokesman for Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu today lamented Israel’s execution of Holocaust mastermind Adolf Eichmann in 1962, noting that the architect of the Final Solution could have been released with other killers of Jews this ...
Read More »After Rocket Fire, Israel Retaliates Harshly Against Trees, Rocks
Kiryat Shmonah, Israel, December 29 (AP) – One of five rockets fired from Lebanon hit near this northern Israeli town today, and the IDF responded fiercely with dozens of artillery shells aimed at empty fields, rocky hillsides, and unpopulated cedar ...
Read More »Book Accuses Jews of Controlling Israeli Government
London, July 9 – In a new twist on an age-old stereotype, a British Muslim author’s newest work charges that a relatively small number of Jews effectively controls the workings of Israel, a country that most people consider a democracy. ...
Read More »Israeli-Palestinian Talks At Impasse; Negotiators Watch The Princess Bride Instead
Jerusalem, Israel (AP) – After several fruitless weeks of back-and-forth negotiations over so-called Final Status issues over which Israelis and Palestinians differ, the delegates to the talks have decided to abandon the effort and watch The Princess Bride repeatedly instead. The talks, ...
Read More »Obama Cancels Failed Program To Get All Israelis To Drown Selves In Sea
Washington, DC (AP) – President Obama has instructed the State Department to end its four-year-old attempt to convince Israelis to resolve the ongoing conflict with the Palestinians and other Arab nations by voluntarily drowning themselves in the Mediterranean Sea. The ...
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