“My first thought was it shouldn’t matter who it is, since Zionism is inherently a war crime,” acknowledged Omar Shakir of Human Rights Watch. Jerusalem, May 5 – The deadline for incumbent Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu to form a coalition ...
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Feed SubscriptionBeast Changes Mind, Will Eat Sanctimonious Irritating Useful Idiots First
“I don’t even have a soul and I feel drained after encountering them.” Tel Aviv, April 28 – The metaphorical monster threatening the conquest and subjugation of the otherwise free people of this society disclosed today that it has undergone ...
Read More »Prophet Samuel Thinking Maybe This Not Best Time To Suggest He Anoint Bibi
The dilemma facing Samuel carries extra valence in light of the political paralysis plaguing Israel. Ramah, April 19 – The seer most closely associated with the establishment of monarchy in Israel voiced his realization today that the current milieu might ...
Read More »Netanyahu Strategy Apparently To Wear Everyone Out With Repeated Elections Till He The Only Voter Left
Experts differ on the timetable for that eventuality. Caesarea, April 8 – Yet another electoral stalemate in Israel has the citizenry bracing for another contest as early as this coming summer, which will mark the fifth time in four years ...
Read More »Passover Recess Allows MKs Break From Accomplishing Nothing
Some respite from the grueling work of doing diddly-squat. Jerusalem, March 25 – Israeli legislators began to breathe easy today with the approach of the springtime Pesach festival, knowing that the time off before, during, and after the holiday allows ...
Read More »Protesters Struggle To Envision Life Without Bibi Against Whom To Protest
“I’m sure we’ll still have the Haredim to target as the source of our society’s ills.” Jerusalem, March 16 – A group of demonstrators who have dedicated their Saturday nights to cacophonous marches through the streets of Israel’s capital, bellowing ...
Read More »Bibi Mulls Courting Israeli Left By Emulating Biden, Sniffing Women’s Hair
Elections are scheduled for March 26. Caesarea, March 4 – Israel’s incumbent prime minister floated the idea today of appealing to segments beyond his traditional right-wing base by adopting some behaviors of the center-left American president, such as standing behind ...
Read More »Court Dispenses With Pretense, Allows Arab Parties To Run Gangs, Intimidate Voters
“Why should Christians get to be the only ones who get to blame the Jews of all time for the imagined sins of a previous generation?” Jerusalem, February 24 – In a move that High Court justices explained will streamline ...
Read More »Netanyahu Suggests Postponing Elections Till After Elections
This biggest issue: polling places as superspreader venues. Jerusalem, February 15 – Worrisome COVID infection levels have prompted Israel’s prime minister to float the idea of waiting to hold the next round of national voting until following the next round ...
Read More »Fringe Parties Warn Israeli Democracy In Peril If Fringe Parties Kept Out Of Power
“Don’t call us Kahanist! We’ve rebranded since the 1980’s and now we identify as an oppressed minority.” Tel Aviv, February 4 – Political groups at the extremes of Israeli society with a small following cautioned today that the representative, accountable ...
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