Employing his diplomatic immunity, Netanyahu will repeat the taboo phrase for the duration of his speech. Jerusalem, January 29 – Sources within the Prime Minister’s Office reported today that Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu will deliver an address to the Polish legislature later ...
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Feed SubscriptionSarsour Promises Vaginas Confiscated From Hirsi Ali, Gabriel To Ahed Tamimi
The Tamimi clan has yet to offer a formal response; the couple was too busy fielding expressions of support for cousin Ahlam, accomplice to the slaughter of 15 people in a 2001 bombing. Tel Aviv, January 23 – A prominent Palestinian-American activist who styles ...
Read More »Opponents Sikh Of Netanyahu Trying To Curry Favor With India
The prime minister called talk of his supposed inability to conduct the business of the state a naan-issue. Jerusalem, January 17 – Political adversaries of the prime minister took to the media today to denounce him for using a trip ...
Read More »Left-Wing Pols Wish They Had Hostile Press To Attack, Blame
“Haaretz, at least, should know better, with its out-in-the-open prioritizing of political change over journalistic integrity.” Tel Aviv, January 10 – Members of Israel’s political Opposition and adherents of parties or ideologies at odds with the governing right-wing coalition expressed resignation ...
Read More »Commission On Inequality Demands To Know Why Only Construction Workers Killed In Construction Accidents
Figures show not a single death from a construction site accident among income earners of twenty-five-thousand shekels per month and above. Jerusalem, January 4 – An investigative committee formed to study socioeconomic gaps and to formulate policies to address them ...
Read More »Out-Of-Order Toilet Stall In Knesset To Be Named For Trump
Two lawmakers objected to the proposal, arguing that the clog-prone toilet should be named for other, more worthy candidates, perhaps people closer to home. Jerusalem, December 28 – Reports of discussions surrounding a proposal to name a future train station ...
Read More »Gov’t Clerks On Strike, No One Notices Difference In Service
Many government and public-sector employees find it difficult to transition from their routine stonewalling of citizens to the stonewalling that takes place as part of a strike. Jerusalem, December 20 – A strike among public-sector workers entered its fourth day ...
Read More »Netanyahu Agrees To Make Israel Socialist, Bans Opposition Parties
The prime minister gave a specific nod to Socialist Venezuela, where the opposition has been similarly banned. Jerusalem, December 13 – Bowing to ongoing criticism from the left of Israel’s political spectrum, Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu agreed today to implement ...
Read More »Joint List Misses Deadline To Renew Status As Fifth Column
The List will not be permitted to avail itself of Fifth Column privileges for the next two years, but will be eligible to reapply at the end of 2019. Jerusalem, December 11 – The alliance of four mostly-Arab parties in Israel’s parliament ...
Read More »Third-Rate Commentators Sadly Archive Unused David Bitan Fat Jokes
All these perfectly good fat jokes are going to go to waist. Tel Aviv, December 5 – Following reports that Coalition Whip David Bitan will step down after being implicated in a corruption investigation, hack writers and pundits across Israel’s ...
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