Kahlon ordered the preparation of the report following the lackluster performance of his flagship housing initiative. Tel Aviv, August 16 – Rising real estate prices have put the purchase of a home beyond the reach of most Israelis who seek ...
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Feed SubscriptionCommittee On Status Of Women Appoints Chief Mansplainer
“We trust him to distill and explain things that our female brains, addled by hormones, are ill-equipped to handle.” Jerusalem, August 9 – The Israeli legislature’s Committee on the Status of Women has appointed one of its male members to ...
Read More »Socialist Parties Ask Journalists Not To Report On Venezuela Unrest
Coverage of such developments might give the public the wrong idea about what happens when a government administers the economy and drives it into the ground. Jerusalem, July 31 – Figures across the left part of Israel’s political spectrum seek ...
Read More »Bibi Hizkiyahu Sends Temple Treasure To Assyrians, Who Definitely Won’t Make More Demands
“This was a bold, decisive move,” insisted Yuval Shebnitz, an official closely allied with King Bibi. Jerusalem, July 27 – King Bibi Hizkiyahu of Judah emptied the treasury of Solomon’s Temple and sent them as tribute to the advancing King ...
Read More »Seeing Govt’ Refuse To Escalate, Arab MKs Take Matters Into Own Hands
“As the Jewish proverb states, ‘In a place where there is no man, strive to be a man.'” Jerusalem, July 23 – The Israeli government’s relative restraint in the aftermath of two murdered police officers and more than a week ...
Read More »NY Times, Meretz In Content-Sharing Agreement
“Technically, it would be more democratic if we focused on Israelis, but politics is the art of compromise,” acknowledged MK Ilan Gilon. Tel Aviv, July 18 – A leading news and opinion powerhouse has joined forces with like-minded figures on ...
Read More »New Labor Chief Vows To Fight Religious Indoctrination, B’ezrat Hashem
Ssecular parents and activists fear a trend of religion encroaching on the secular public sphere, lo aleinu. Tel Baruch, Tel Aviv, July 13 – The new head of Israel’s largest Opposition party devoted his attention today to parents’ concerns that their ...
Read More »Palestinians Cry ‘Apartheid’ Over Election Of Jew To Lead Israeli Labor
Labor officials acknowledged Erekat’s argument. “It’s more or less true.” Ramallah, July 5 – Following the election of a yet another Israeli Jew as the new chairman of the country’s Labor Party, Palestinian leaders accused both the party and wider ...
Read More »Ministry Of Health Announces Recall Of Labor Primary
“None of the credible candidates offer the promise of eliminating or mitigating this threat to public health,” elaborated Aryush Itinmi. Jerusalem, July 3 – Public Health officials in Israel announced today they are recalling the latest batch of Labor Party ...
Read More »Knesset Cafeteria Found Infested By Politicians
“We cannot risk people being exposed to those vile creatures.” Jerusalem, June 28 – Health inspectors visiting Israel’s legislative compound have closed the site’s dining facility after discovering the space teeming with politicans. The room is expected to remain closed ...
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