“To pursue a path of conciliation would be a shameful betrayal of our paths to date.” Umm el-Fahm, October 21 – Members of the Joint List political alliance of mostly Arab parties voiced concern today over rumors that Palestinian Authority ...
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Feed SubscriptionKnesset Security Gearing Up For 120 Clown Sightings
The ten-dozen-plus clowns are supposed to be there, possibly as a way of keeping them off the streets and frightening even more people – at least that’s what the electorate seems to want. Jerusalem, October 13 – Israel’s parliamentary security ...
Read More »Zionist Union Still Looking For Way To Show Hurricane Matthew Bibi’s Fault
“If Herzog and Livni are serious about standing a chance in the next election, they had better agree exactly which loony anti-Bibi conspiracy theory to promote.” Tel Aviv, October 7 – Leaders of the opposition Zionist Union faction in the ...
Read More »Arab MKs To Attend Peres Funeral If Allowed To Distribute Candy
“I daresay the Zionist State will refuse this compromise, betraying the very intransigence which lies at the root of the conflict.” Jerusalem, September 29 – Leaders of Israel’s Arab political parties softened their stance today on the death and funeral ...
Read More »New Rule Would Keep Knesset Sessions From Going Past Herzog’s Bedtime
Plenum sessions have challenged him, since Knesset rules preclude his bringing his enormous teddy bear into the chamber as he nurses a glass of warm milk and listens to a favorite story. Jerusalem, September 25 – A proposed amendment to deliberation rules ...
Read More »Report: Apartheid Implementation Agency Targeting Jews Instead Of Arabs
Jews are barred from expressions of religious devotion on the Temple Mount, Judaism’s holiest site, while Muslims are free to behave there as they wish. Jerusalem, September 21 – An investigative commission on the activities of the newly-established Apartheid Implementation Agency has ...
Read More »Barak Comeback: Bibi’s Plan To Destroy Left Once And For All
“He’ll lead the party and the entire Left into oblivion for years to come.” Tel Aviv, September 15 – Political analysts are hailing Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu’s latest machinations to weaken the opposition, specifically his engineering of former Prime Minister Ehud ...
Read More »Israeli Democracy Dead For 456,798,746th Time
The corpse of Israeli democracy had hardly grown cold since the last time Bibi ordered its killing. Jerusalem, September 12 – Experts pronounced the demise of Israeli democracy this week for the 456,798,746th time, a development they directly attribute to ...
Read More »Workers At Ministry Of NSFW Forced To Work From Home
“I can’t even get my staff together in one room, let alone hold a meeting with different groups.” complained a section supervisor. Jerusalem, September 7 – Employees at the government ministry handling all not-safe-for-work materials on the internet remain unable ...
Read More »Arab MK: If I Can Have Multiple Wives, I Should Get Multiple Votes
“The Knesset should count my votes many times, since I am performing the role of multiple men.” Jerusalem, August 31 – A member of the Joint List alliance of Arab parties in the Knesset has demanded that the State show ...
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