The Sanhedrin voted 70-1 in favor of the motion. Jerusalem, August 27 – The highest court in Jewish Law has decreed that Twitter users who click “Like” on a tweet when no compelling reasons exist for any response other than ...
Read More »Category Archives: Religion
Feed SubscriptionMuslims: Shofar Blasts During Jewish Month Of Elul A Call To Destroy Al Aqsa
As evidence, the Islamic authorities point to the fact that they never need real evidence. Jerusalem, August 23 – Spiritual leaders at a contested Jerusalem holy site are warning that the Jewish practice of sounding a ram’s horn each weekday ...
Read More »Jesus Agrees Beatles More Popular
“You do Me no favors by showcasing your insecurity over the observations of a celebrity.” Jerusalem, August 16 – Jesus Christ, son of God, the Prince of Peace, King of the Jews, Messiah and Savior, shrugged His shoulders today and ...
Read More »In Hell, Terrorists Subjected To Endless Loop Of ‘Horse With No Name’
“It’s not even Neil Young – it’s Neil Young wannabe, which is somehow even worse.” Hades, August 14 – Perpetrators of political violence aimed at innocents face a new regimen of eternal suffering in the afterlife, consisting of a continuous ...
Read More »Kollel Wives Resort To Prostitution To Support Husbands
The trend is strongest among wives whose parents cannot afford to support the couple in as lavish a fashion as their more fortunate peers. Lakewood, New Jersey, August 8 – Increasing pressure on the wives of men who study in yeshiva full ...
Read More »Stringent Jews Extend Tisha B’Av Prohibition On Studying Torah To Whole Year
The vast majority of the world’s approximately 15 million Jews now refrain from Torah study all year long. Jerusalem, August 1 – The mourning practices associated with the saddest day on the Jewish calendar include a prohibition against studying all ...
Read More »Returning To Temple Mount, Waqf Hopes To Make Up For Lost Sports, Dancing At Holy Site
The group acknowledges the need now to compensate for the races, day camp activities, gymnastics displays, and other sacred rituals that were not performed on the Temple Mount during that period. Jerusalem, July 27 – Religious officials at Islam’s third-holiest ...
Read More »As Temple Mount Security Compromise, Rabbinate Says Just Put Up Certificate
In exchange for a monthly fee, they may display certification of supervision, regardless of how often the facility is actually subject to inspection, if at all. Jerusalem, July 23 – Representatives of the Chief Rabbinate division charged with overseeing compliance ...
Read More »Allah So Damn Akbar He Can’t Defend His Third-Holiest Site From Lowly Jews
Jews have maintained a security presence in and around the compound for fifty years, a disgrace to Islam so intense that it calls into question the notion that Allah is, in fact, as akbar as His worshipers proclaim. Jerusalem, July ...
Read More »Environmenatlists Chide Jeremiah For Using Almond Branch In Vision
“Almond trees, like all trees, are not objects to be used or invoked by humanity at will, but creatures that deserve dignity.” Anatot, Kingdom of Judah, July 13 – Ecology-minded activists and organizations issued a rebuke to the prophet Jeremiah ...
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